Roots and Branches
by GuardianEnzo
Summary: In the hours after "Sins of the Father", big changes are coming to Cadet Matrix' life. And he discovers that sometimes the little things matter more than Web World Wars...
1. Seedlings

Thanks to LadyBard and System Angel for all their support and feedback

Thanks to LadyBard and System Angel for all their support and feedback.Many plot elements in this story will make much more sense if you've read my earlier fics, especially "Null and Void" and "Sins of the Father".

ROOTS AND BRANCHES 

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CHAPTER I 

The Principal Office is a weird place.

I guess that sounds kind of funny…It's, like, the most important place in Mainframe.That's where the core energy, is, and the command center, and Phong lives there and he's pretty much the most important sprite around.Every time there's any trouble that's where they always try and send me so I don't get hurt.

But it's weird because there's so much to it – so many places that no one every really thinks about, but they're still there.Well, maybe Phong thinks about them but no one else does.I wonder if they'd exist if he didn't think about them.That's weird, too…Anyway, there's all kinds of rooms and chambers and annexes and stuff, places where hardly anyone ever goes.Except maybe Phong.Almost like it's bigger on the inside than the outside.

But the P.O. also feels weird to me because that's the place I think about when I think about me being a copy.'Cause that's the last place I remember being before the reboot happened.And it's the first place I was afterwards, and all that time had passed – even though I didn't know it.And it was destroyed – this huge place that I thought would last forever and ever and nothing bad could ever happen to it – it was destroyed and came back and I missed the whole deleted thing!

So ever since the reboot I always felt a little tingle of weirdness whenever I went to the P.O., just because it made me think for a nano about all that stuff.But then Phong would come in and start talking and I'd get lost in whatever he was saying and it would all sort of fade away.

But I was still kinda feeling that tingle, because I hadn't seen Phong.I hadn't really seen anyone – I walked through the corridors for a while, just thinking.And then I went to the conservatory, because that's where I'd been headed.But it took me a while to get there 'cause I got lost.And the conservatory was one of those Phong places – hardly anyone else ever went there.But that's where I wanted to go.

I sat down on the floor and crossed my legs.There weren't any chairs or tables or benches or anything – just plants.Plants and little trees and big trees and a clear dome over the top where the ceiling would be, and the glow from the core came through and kinda lit the room in a cool way.Dot said it was the ambient light from the core – that's what she called it.And Phong said that's why the plants did so well, 'cause they like that special light.

The light was sorta soft and made me feel safe and relaxed – and there was a little datafall, just a little thing tumbling over some rocks in the garden but it made a really nice sound and that made me feel relaxed too.It was the only sound in the room, except I could hear myself breathing which I never noticed when I was anywhere else.All in all, it's a really amazing place.

That safe feeling stayed with me for a little while as I sat there and looked around, but pretty soon I was thinking about other things and I guess I figured that coming here wasn't really fixing anything, just delaying it.Maybe there's nothing wrong with that, but it made me feel guilty, like I should've been somewhere else, not here wasting time.

I looked over at one little tree, and that made me feel better and worse at the same time.It looked a lot bigger than the last time I saw it, and that made me feel better.But I felt guilty again, like I'd been neglecting it or something.Which made me think about all the other stuff I'd been thinking about all cycle.

"It is faring very well, is it not?"

"Phong!You scared me…"

"I am sorry, My Son."Phong always made a kind of whirring sound when he walked – or rolled…Whatever.So how he snuck up one me I don't know.He whirred over and stood next to me."I am sure it is happy to see you."

"Maybe." I smiled.Could a directory tree be happy to see me?"It's sure grown a lot."

"Growth is the way of living things.Especially the young ones, I think.Growth and change."

"I guess."I never knew everything Phong was talking about, but whenever he talked I felt like everything would be OK.At least for a nano."I feel like I should be taking better care of it…"

"I am here every cycle, Child." Phong smiled."It is no trouble for me to care for it, as I care for my other botanical friends.I am most pleased to see you here, however.My garden receives very few visitors – that is why I have nowhere for you to sit, I suppose.I hope you do not mind-"

"It's cool, Phong.I like sitting on the floor.This is a really alphanumeric place."

"I concur, young Guardian.I concur."

"I'm glad my tree is doing good.I guess this was a good place to plant it."

Phong chuckled.It sounded a lot like the datafall."Perhaps you are now thinking that it was not such a bad gift?" 

"I never thought it was a bad gift!" I protested."I…It was just a little weird, that's all.Matrix didn't know any better.He didn't know much about presents and stuff like that."

"Perhaps he knew more than you imagined, young Enzo.His gift is ever growing and changing, is it not?And such a gift is a rare and special gift indeed.Perhaps that thought was in his processor."

"Maybe." I smiled, looking over at the little tree."He's a good sprite.He does the best he can.Believe me, I know."

"Indeed."Phong patted me on the shoulder, so lightly I almost didn't feel it."I think, however, that you have not come to talk to me about Matrix today."

"Huh?What do you mean, Phong?"

He arched an eyebrow."Perhaps I am wrong, Child.Perhaps you merely came here to ruminate, to be by yourself."

I don't know what "ruminate" means, but I picked up his drift."I…Maybe I didn't…"

"Indeed, indeed.It is only that you young sprites come to talk to me, from time to time.When you are having difficulty processing your feelings.I thought perhaps that this was such a time."

"Why would you say that?"I knew as soon as I asked it that it was a silly question.Even a dumb sprite could tell I'd been offline, and Phong was the furthest thing from a dumb sprite in the net.

"No reason."He pulled his spindly hands behind his back and whirred over to stare at the directory trees."Call it an intuition, I suppose.A sense.I find that sprites are often troubled during times of change – even if it is a change for the good.Change is never easy, especially for the young.So you see, with your impending departure for the Guardian Academy I thought that, perhaps, you were feeling troubled."

"I'm OK with going to the Academy." I sighed."I mean…I guess I'm a little nervous and everything, but I… I think I'm ready.I think."I walked over and stood next to him.

"I am sure you are correct."He turned and smiled."I have seen much growth in you, My Son – and not just in physical stature.Your forays into the games with Bob have been most helpful.You are not the small sprite you were after the reboot."

"I'm barely 1.3…"

"Nevertheless…I have spent many hours, days even - watching the changes in this system, in it's sprites.Your development has been most gratifying.You are a fine young sprite."

"Thanks, Phong."I could feel myself blushing – I never took compliments very well.

"The war with Daemon goes well.Soon you will be at the Academy, learning and growing in ways you cannot even imagine.It is a remarkable time, is it not Child?"

"I guess so, Phong."

He smiled again."Still, here you are.And indeed, this is a fine place – suitable for consideration and reflection.And I am in no hurry. Would you care for some tea?Cocoa?"

What _was_ it with him and cocoa?Like AndrAIa and motorbikes!"No thanks.I'm cool."

"Would you like a sweater?"

"No!I…"I saw the innocent little smirk on his face.Phong could be funny, but not usually when he was trying to be!I heard myself giggle."No thanks, Phong."

"Well, then…"He patted my shoulder again and turned to stare at the datafall.He was quiet for a couple of nanos."How is your sister coming to terms with your imminent departure, Child?"

I stiffened when he said that.I know he noticed."I think she's just fine with it, Phong."

"Indeed, indeed.And Bob?"

I relaxed a little."Bob's pretty proud." I felt myself grin."I'm the first student he's ever had go to the Academy."

"And well he should be proud."

"I can tell he's sad about me going, though.He tries not to let on, but I can tell.Bob's not too good about hiding his feelings and stuff."

"Not all of us can be."Phong said softly.He reached out and grabbed one of the leaves on my directory tree and studied it real close for a nano or two."Would you care to take a walk with me, young Guardian?"

"Sure."He turned and started slowly towards the glass doors of the conservatory, then started off down one of the long corridors.I followed him.I had to make myself walk slower than usual so I wouldn't dart out in front of him.I flashed back to the time he brought me to the read-only room, all that time ago…When I wanted to be smarter."Where are we going?"

He didn't answer me – he just kind of glided along, hands behind his back.He took a turn and went off down another corridor, then another.There was no way I'd ever be able to find my way back without him, I knew that.We were in a part of the P.O. I'd never seen before.

Finally, he stopped in front of a kind of small, plain looking door.He palmed the little sensor to the right of it, and it slid open.He whirred inside."Here we are…"

"Where?"I looked around.The room was bare except for a small command console in the center."What is this place?"

Phong looked around and smiled."Did you know that everything that happens in Mainframe is logged in a temporary directory?Until the system in upgraded or rebooted?"

"Dude!Really?"

"Mmm-hmm.The records are retained as .TMP files – until, as I say, the system is rebooted or upgraded.This room is the repository for those .TMP files."

"Really?"I craned my neck and look up at the ceiling, at all the walls."It doesn't look like much, Phong.Not like the archives or anything.This is a puny little hut!"

"Perhaps." He said softly.He drummed his fingers on the console."It occurred to me, long ago, that these files could be a useful tool for assessing the status of the city - for spotting tears in uninhabited areas, perhaps, or searching for anomalies undetected by the security protocols.The material is extensive – I could spend all of my waking seconds reviewing it.So I restrict myself to the areas of possible danger – the empty sectors, the shore of the data sea, the edge of the city, anywhere that an invasion could come from or a danger be undetected.Whenever I find anything of interest, I transfer it to a portable storage device for future review."

"Huh!"Yet another thing I never knew about."Did you ever find anything useful?"

"On occasion.I have detected a tear or two, a few other interesting anomalies.Your sister is aware that I review these files, of course – as well as your older brother and Bob."

"Why are you showing _me_?I mean – thanks, and everything, but…"

"Impatient as ever, young Enzo." He smiled. I blushed again.Everyone was impatient compared to Phong."Well, to the point, then.I thought one of these files might be of interest to you."

"To…To me?Why?"

"In light of your current situation.The sadness I feel in you, the uncertainty.I think it is important that you go forward to this new chapter in your life free of those burdens.Your challenges will be many, and difficult – you should face them with a light heart and an unbroken spirit."

"But…"I was totally confused now."What could these files possibly have to do with that?"

Phong opened a drawer and pulled out a small storage disk.He held it up and nodded at me, so I took it from him."It is not only tears and empty sectors I see when I review these files, young Guardian.Sometimes I see sprites, as well.This file in particular was, I thought, most fascinating.As it relates to your sister, Dot."

"Dot?" I whispered."That doesn't feel right to me, Phong. I mean - she doesn't know you're showing me this, does she?"

"Do not worry, Child – you are in this file as well."

"Me?!"That felt ever more wrong."But-"

"Do not worry, Child.I feel certain Dot would not mind your seeing this.And I am hopeful that it might quell some of the sadness that grips you."

"But…"

"Perhaps it is only me, being a silly old sprite." Phong chuckled."Perhaps there is nothing wrong, and I am merely wasting both my time and yours.But I think you should review the file, my boy.There is no harm in it – I feel sure Dot would not mind."

I looked down at the disk.It was hard to see how anything on it would make me feel any better.Besides, just how much did Phong know about what was bothering me, anyway?But he was trying to help…"I guess I'll watch it, Phong.Thanks.But-"

"Simply place it in the drive, Child.The file will load automatically and shut down once it has been viewed.Open a vidwindow to me once you are finished here – I think perhaps you will need my assistance in finding the path back outside."

"Aren't you staying?"

"I think not, Child."Phong patted my hand softly."Watch the file whenever you are ready.And call me when you wish to leave."Just like that, he turned and whirred off, and I was alone in the room with the disk.

Well, Phong always was hard to figure out.I don't think it was just me – even Bob and Dot seemed to have no clue what he was saying sometimes.But whenever Phong tried to teach me something – even the time he tricked me with that clock speed stuff – I always ended up better off.So maybe he knew what he was doing…

So after I stared at the disk for a few more nanos I popped it into the drive like Phong said, still feeling kinda guilty about watching it without Dot knowing.A vidscreen popped up over the console, right at eye level, and I leaned my elbows on the console to watch.It looked like it was from the beach, somewhere…

_The data sea was bright blue as it reflected the brilliant, clear sky.The beach wasn't crowded – just two sprites lying on towels, propped up on their elbows staring at the water.There were two sprites in the water, a man and a boy._

_ _

_"You threw it wrong!"_

_ _

_"I didn't throw it wrong!" Bob laughed."You were just too slow to catch it!"_

_ _

_"Booobb!" Enzo whined."Just throw it again, OK?I need the practice!What if we have to play 'Super Bowl 2100' again?"_

_ _

_"Last time I checked that game isn't played in the data sea."_

_ _

_"Bob!"_

_ _

_"All right, Tiger – you win.Go deep!Deeper!"_

_ _

_ _

_"Do they ever grow up?"_

_ _

_"Who – boys?" Dot laughed."Nope – not as I've ever seen, anyways."_

_ _

_"Oh, well."AndrAIa sighed."I guess that's why they need us."_

_ _

_"Yup."Dot smiled as Bob threw the football high into the air, and Enzo splashed through the shallow data after it.The small sprite dove for the ball and missed, plunging into the data and coming up soaked."Oh!Poor thing…"_

_ _

_"He loves it." AndrAIa giggled._

_ _

_"I guess."Dot watched the two males tossing the football for a few nanos, a distant smile on her face."I wish Matrix could have spent the cycle with us.Too bad he had to rewrite the security protocols."_

_ _

_"He likes his job a little too much." AndrAIa scowled."He's still not the most social sprite in the net.Old habits die hard."_

_ _

_"Yes they do." Dot sighed._

_ _

_"Still – he's done all right, all things considered. Thanks to you."_

_ _

_"Oh, stop it…"_

_ _

_"I mean it!" AndrAIa laughed."Think about it.He had no parents since he was 0.3.Look at him out there – look how happy he is!Look at Matrix – everything he survived out there.They're both OK.And it's because of you."_

_ _

_"That's nice of you to say, Sweetie – but I didn't do anything special.I didn't have a clue."_

_ _

_"I bet!"_

_ _

_"I mean it!" Dot laughed."If I'd had a brother close to my own age, that would be one thing.But I didn't.What in the net did I know about little boys?How they thought, what they felt?Enzo might as well have been from another net as much as I knew about him when Mom and Dad died."_

_ _

_"Oh, come on!Dot-"_

_ _

_"It's true.It's different with Matrix, now…But with Enzo it's never really been like he was my brother.Not after the first couple of hours.More like he was my… My son, I suppose.But I sure wasn't ready to be his mother!"_

_ _

_Dot reached over and gently grasped AndrAIa's hand, smiling."The best I can say about myself is that I tried my best.But Enzo…You know, AndrAIa, he never once tried to make me feel guilty about the way things were.I know how much he must've been tempted, sometimes.When he didn't get his way, or something…But he never resented me once for not being his Mom.It's like he knew I was doing the best I could…"_

_ _

_"I'm sure he knew."_

_ _

_"Pretty amazing.For such a little boy." Dot said softly."If he ever resented me, he never let me know it."The Command.Com sighed."I just tried to learn about him as best I could as we went along.And I learned pretty quickly that he had a lot of love inside his heart – that he needed to be able to share it.That's how he is.And he never once withheld it from me – not even during the bad times, when we fought.He's pretty amazing."_

_ _

_"You both are." AndrAIa smiled._

_ _

_"That's when it all started to make sense." Dot chuckled."Even if I didn't understand what he was thinking, why he had to try and follow me into games, or why he wanted to crash around the data dump until he smelled like a recycle bin…I figured out that as long as he knew I loved him and I'd always take care of him, we could survive the rest of it.That what we always tried to do.And I guess it worked out OK…"_

_ _

_"I know it has." The game sprite said softly."Matrix got his strength from you, Dot – it was your love that kept him going through all the bad times."_

_ _

_"Maybe that was part of it.But he's got strength inside him that you can't even imagine, AndrAIa.They both do.Even they don't realize it sometimes, but it's there."_

_ _

_AndrAIa said nothing, turning her gaze to stare out over the data.Bob and Enzo were well down the beach now, jogging towards them, the boy's high-pitched giggling barely reaching the two women's ears as they reclined on the sand."Do you ever wish it had been different, Dot?"_

_ _

_"What's that, Sweetie?"_

_ _

_"You know." The game sprite said softly."Everything.Your parents – you know…Me coming to Mainframe…It's not like you exactly got to choose your own life."_

_ _

_"I wonder, sometimes." Dot whispered, rubbing her belly absently."I miss my parents every cycle, and I don't deny that I'd have done things differently if I hadn't had to take care of Enzo when I was so young.But I don't ever wish things weren't what they were.I mean – I wish my folks were here.But raising Enzo – that was an incredible gift, AndrAIa.We were both so alone, so vulnerable – and we were all the other had.We've shared so much, we need each other so much…"_

_ _

_Dot was silent for a nano.She looked over at the younger woman."I wouldn't trade that for anything, Honey.To love someone so much, to need them so much – that's really special.Maybe I would've gotten married, had a kid of my own when I was young enough for it to make sense…But it doesn't matter, I still wouldn't trade it.It didn't matter that Enzo was my brother – it still doesn't.He is what he is – and he means more to me than I could ever explain.He always will."_

_ _

_"Hey, you two."Bob yawned, flopping down to the sand next to Dot._

_ _

_"You missed all the fun." Enzo grinned.AndrAIa slid over and the youngster slipped between his sister and the game sprite._

_ _

_"That kind of fun I don't need." Dot winced as Enzo shook his head wildly, data splattering her face._

_ _

_"I'm with you." Bob chuckled.He stretched out and closed his eyes."I'm all worn out.Takin' a nap."_

_ _

_"C'mere, you."_

_ _

_"Hey!" Enzo protested as Dot draped his head in a towel._

_ _

_"Stop wiggling!Your hair's all wet!"_

_ _

_"Stop it!"_

_ _

_"Just hush up!" Dot sighed, flashing an exasperated smile at AndrAIa.She roughly tousled the boy's hair with the towel, the draped it around his shoulders."There – was that so bad?"_

_ _

_Enzo glanced surreptitiously at AndrAIa, then glowered at his sister."It wasn't that wet…"_

_ _

_"You looked like a drowned null!" Dot laughed.Enzo shook his head and lay back, hands behind his head._

_ _

_"Poor Enzo." AndrAIa smiled and winked at Dot.The boy blushed, looking away, and AndrAIa gently ruffled his hair.The three sprites sat in silence for a long moment, the gentle crashing of the waves soon joined by a soft snoring from Bob's blanket._

_ _

_After several more nanos of silence, Dot reached down and grabbed the towel around Enzo's neck.Smiling, she tugged it upwards, pulling the boy with it until his head rested against her shoulder."Hey!What's up?"_

_ _

_"Nothing." Dot said softly, tousling his still damp hair.She brushed a lock out of his eyes and kissed his forehead gently."Just felt like doing that, is all."_

_ _

_ _

And that's where it ended.Just like that.

Naturally, my processor was going in about a billion directions at once afterwards – seems like it always is anyways.I thought about when that'd happened – when the four of us had gone to the beach.I'd forgotten about it – it hadn't seemed like it was anything special, just a nice cycle.But hearing Dot saying all that stuff…It still felt I was listening to something I wasn't supposed to, but it made me feel good to hear it.It was really confusing, though.It didn't make any sense.

For some reason seeing it made me think of another time, before that cycle at the beach.I'd been out practicing on my surfboard – the one Mouse made for me.I'd been surfing all over the place – all over Baudway and floating point, just practicing my turns and circles and dives and stuff and feeling pretty good about myself.

So I started back towards the diner.I was feeling pretty high-res, just caught up in the excitement of flying around – I couldn't wait to tell Bob and Dot how good I was getting on the board.

I was coming in low across Baudway, right in front of the diner.I even looked both ways crossing the street!Then, out of nowhere a tear opened up – almost right in front of me.It was pretty scary 'cause it caught me totally by surprise.I banked hard to the right to avoid the tear and I did, but my arms started flailing all around and I lost control of the board.It gets a little fuzzy after that, but I remember the board went sideways, I slipped off and I guess I tried to slide my legs under me but I didn't have time.I felt my knee bang against the pavement and I heard the board crack as it slammed into a parked car – not Bob's, thank the User.

The next thing I remember is being on my back, and my whole right leg was hurting like crazy.I could hear myself moaning and I put my hand down against my knee and when I brought it up to my face, it had blood on it.I looked down and the front of my Guardian trousers was all torn away at the knee and there was more blood.A lot of blood.Well, it looked like a lot to me, anyway.

I moaned some more and started to push myself up, but I felt kinda woozy and I fell down again.The next thing I knew, someone was holding me down and I heard Dot's voice in my ear."Honey, are you OK?"

"Ow!"I just said it over and over, like ten times, it really hurt.A lot.

"Come on now.You'll be just fine."She said it real calm, but I could hear a little afraid in her voice.She sort of scooped me up and carried me inside, and I just kept moaning from the pain."Shhh.It's OK, Sweetie.I'm here now."

"The tear!" I said.I guess I remembered it was still out there, which should count for something I think.

"Don't worry about that.I told Cecil to call Bob – he'll mend it."She set me down on the counter, and I realized I was in the kitchen.She smiled at me and kissed my forehead."Let's just take care of you, OK?"

"My knee really hurts!"Original, huh?

"I know.Let's just see how bad it's hurt, ok?"She kind of ripped the loose material away like it was nothing, and uncovered my knee.She grabbed my leg and started to bend and unbend it, real slowly."Does this hurt?"

"Yes!" I moaned.But she looked at my face and smiled.She felt my kneecap, real gently.There was some blood on her hands, but she didn't wipe it off."Nothing's broken, Sweetie.Doesn't look too bad.Let's get you cleaned up."She ran a towel under some warm data and started to wipe the blood off my knee.

"It wasn't my fault!" I said.I didn't much like the way my voice sounded, but it was the best I could do."That tear just opened up right in front of me!"I could kind of feel my chest heaving up and down.

"I know, Enzo.I saw the whole thing.I know it wasn't your fault."She finished wiping my knee off and kissed me on top of the head.That really set me off, for some reason.

"My board b-broke!"

"I know, Sweetie.I'm sure Specs can fix it, don't worry."

"Crash it all!"

"I don't think you're going to need any stitches, thank the User.Just lost a little skin, that's all.We'll get Phong to check you and make sure, but you'll be fine."

"Delete it!"I really felt terrible – my knee burned like crazy, my head hurt, my board was broken, my uniform was all torn up…

She took my head in her hands and held me against her shoulder.She started to kiss my forehead and smooth my hair really slowly, like she did when I was a little kid."Shhh.It's OK Enzo.I'm here, it's all right…"

It's embarrassing to admit, but it felt really good to have her do that.Before I knew it my fists were in my eyes, trying to keep the tears from coming out, but it didn't do any good.I just wrapped my arms around her neck and held on while she talked to me, real softly.It felt like the only place in the net where I could ever really be safe, right there.My knee hurt a lot but it wasn't all _that_ bad.I don't know why it meant so much to me – but it did.

She sort of held me and talked to me for a little while and I didn't say anything, just held onto her until I felt better. She put some antiviral spray on my knee and bandaged it up like she was a medical program, and then she gave me a kiss on the nose and smiled at me.And I kind of coughed a little and smiled back at her.And that was that.

I wasn't sure why I thought about that right after I watched Phong's file.It wasn't that big a deal – I limped around for a few cycles and I had a pixelacious scab on my knee.Specs fixed up my board almost as good as new, except for a little scar where he mended it.No big file.So why did I think about it at that nano?

And then I figured it out.It was because that whole thing happened right after Dot told me the news.

_"Guess what, Enzo – you're going to be an Uncle!"_

I know what you're thinking – the selfish little kid gets jealous of the baby 'cause now he's not the baby any more.But it's not like that, it really isn't.I love my nephew a lot.I even like being an Uncle.Most of the time.

I guess I was pretty shocked when Dot told me.I mean, "Uncle Enzo" – does that sound basic, or what?But that's what I was gonna be.Uncle Enzo.And I was still only a little kid myself.Basic…

I guess it really felt more like I was gonna be a big brother than an uncle – I mean, I know Dot is my sister and everything but it really feels more like something else.She's been taking care of me for so long and everything…Anyway, I liked thinking about it like that better, anyway.I'd never been a big brother.There's never even been any sprites smaller than me around.So that was gonna be kind of cool, in a way.

I think I must have walked around in a fog for a few cycles after she told me, because I don't really remember much except Bob grinning a lot like he'd just single-handedly deleted Daemon's army.The next thing I really remember clearly is walking over to Matrix and AndrAIa's place, which was really Bob's place except Bob lived with us now.

I knocked – I always knocked now, even though I never did when Bob lived there – and I heard Matrix say "It's open."He was sitting on the couch watching a vidscreen and I came over and sat next to him."Hey, Kiddo."

"Hey, Big Guy.What're we watching?"

"I dunno.Not very good, whatever it is.Mike the TV just got voted off of Lost Angles, though – that makes sense.What's up?"

"Not much."I looked around."Where's AndrAIa?"

"Shopping – her favorite activity, next to criticizing me."

That made me giggle.Matrix wasn't funny very often, and I felt like I owed him that much.I was kinda glad Andri wasn't there – normally I'm totally glad to see her all the time, but right now I wanted to talk to Matrix."So – I guess you guys probably heard, huh?"

"Heard what?"I looked at him kinda dumbly for a nano, then he winked."Yeah, I heard."

"Pretty basic, huh?Dot with a kid!"

"I think Bob might have something to do with it too, Pal."

"Matrix!You know what I mean.It's just…It feels weird."

"Yeah…Yeah, I guess it does."He gave me a little light punch on the shoulder."I don't know why I was so surprised when I heard – I mean, it was only logical and all…But I guess I just never believed they'd actually _do_ it.Have a kid…"

"Yeah…"I sort of looked at the vidscreen for a while, but I wasn't really watching.I was thinking."D'you think they'll get married now?"

"I dunno, Enzo.They might. I don't guess it really matters all that much.They definitely love each other.We always knew that – right?"

"Yeah." I smiled.That much was definitely true.

"So how are _you _doing with all this, Pal?"

"What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean."He gave me that little annoyed look he only used on me, when I was trying to pretend like he didn't know what I was thinking."This is a pretty big deal, Enzo.Bigger than Bob moving in, even.Are you OK with it?"

"Sure I am."It's funny, but I hadn't really let myself think about that question until he asked me.And then I realized I'd actually been kinda thinking about it ever since Dot told me."Why wouldn't I be?"

"Come on, now." He sighed."It's gonna be a pretty big change for everybody, Kid.It's sure as deletion gonna be for _you_.Haven't you thought about that?"

"I guess.It's Dot and Bob's decision, Matrix.They can have a kid if they want to…"

"You can do better than that."

I wasn't sure what he wanted me to say.I wasn't sure what _I_ wanted to say."I guess it'll be pretty hard…A lot of work and stuff.Takin' care of it and everything."

"That's all?"

I glared at him, but he just looked back at me with his eyebrow raised a little."What else is there?"

He kept looking at me for a nano, then he shook his head and ruffled my hair."Nothing, Kid.That's it."

"I think it could actually be kinda fun, having a little brother.Or sister.Or nephew, or whatever!Couldn't it?"

"Sure!I can tell you first hand, though – when you've never had a little brother before and you suddenly get one, it's a major shock.They can be a real pain in the bitmap…"

"Real funny!"I punched him in the arm, harder than he punched me but he didn't even feel it.He just laughed and wrestled me into a headlock."Hey!Lemme go!"

"Yes sir, a real pain in the as-"

"Stop it, Matrix!Just let me go!"

He chuckled and let me go, and loosely wrapped his arm around me."Maybe you'll be lucky and it'll be a girl. Little boys are the worst."

"Maybe I'll be lucky and you'll lose your voice capability."

"Hmmm…"He didn't say anything for a little bit, and I sort of fell over against him and we stared at the vidscreen for a while.

"I bet Dot'll be a good mother."It sort of came out of my mouth without me planning to say it, just like a lot of what I say.

Matrix nodded like he'd been expecting me to say it."I think she already is, Pal.Wouldn't you say?"

"Yeah…"He smiled down at me."You remember much from when you were little, Enzo?I mean, about Dot?"I only called him that when it was just us – that's what he wanted.

"Sure I do.I don't remember that many individual cycles, but there are a lot of moments.They're like mpegs in my head, I see them playing over and over."

"Like what?"

He looked at me for a nano or two, like he was deciding what he should say."Mostly I just remember what it felt like.What it felt like when I heard Mom and Dad were gone.What it felt like when Bob was blasted into the web…"

"Jeez!Matrix-"

"I remember good stuff, too." He smiled."I remember being small.Your size.Smaller, maybe.Doesn't matter.I remember being small and having Dot hold me.I remember what it felt like to have her arms around me, what her shoulder feels like when I'm laying my head on it.The sound of her voice when she's talking to me.Even singing, sometimes.How her hands feel when she's smoothing my hair back.How she smells – her perfume or her shampoo, whatever.I don't even know – every time I think about it I feel safe, like nothing could ever hurt me.How safe I felt, you know?How safe and happy I felt when she kissed me on the head, or on the cheek…I remember all of that like it was last cycle."

I was amazed when he said all that.First of all, Matrix doesn't talk for that long._Ever_.Second, it was like he'd just said everything I had in my own processor and never told anybody.That definitely felt weird.Totally weird.But I guess when you have an exact copy, weird stuff is gonna happen.

"Well – I guess I finally figured out how to shut you up!"

"Stop, OK?"I just wanted to think for a micro, not joke around or anything.Something about what he said really disturbed me, but I couldn't quite get my brain around why.

"Sure, Pal."That's a good thing about Matrix not talking much – when you want him to shut up he'll usually do it.He gave me a little squeeze and we just sat there for a while, not talking.

Dot being pregnant was very weird.At first I was scared to even touch her or hug her or anything, like she was gonna break or something.But then she told me I was being silly and that nothing would happen and that made me feel a little more normal around her.But it was still freaky.

Bob spent a lot of time with her, just holding her hand or sitting together, and he looked real proud of himself, especially the first few minutes.He did look very tired in the mornings, though.And Dot started to get where she just looked sick in the morning – her face didn't look green like normal and she was real queasy and stuff.So I had to start doing a lot more around the apartment, like fixing my own breakfast, and sometimes even for Bob and Dot too.I guess that was OK.

Dot tried to work her regular schedule at the diner and the P.O., and she did for a long time.But when she was about halfway through being pregnant, maybe 20 minutes or something, it started to get tougher.She started to get fat, and her back started to hurt and it was harder for her to run around all the time.She usually stayed in a good mood except for the mornings, and she always tried to be nice to me.But I could tell she was getting kind of frustrated with not being able to do all the stuff she normally did.Dot doesn't like to not be _doing_ stuff – she's always been like that, as long as I can remember.

Between Phong and Matrix a lot of Dot's duties as Command.Com were taken care of, so she didn't have to go into the P.O. as much.And Bob and me took care of all the games, so Dot kinda concentrated on running the diner.That was fine for a while, because she didn't have to go out and it was easier for her.But when she was starting to get close to her due date even that got harder for her, and that's when something happened that I didn't like.

I came home from school one cycle and Bob and Dot were sitting in a booth, talking.It was still pretty weird seeing Dot all fat, with a baby inside her.Anyway, they were talking like I said and Dot smiled at me and waved me over, so I sat down next to her.She kissed me on the head like she usually does and asked me how my school day was.

"Good.Boring, like always.How're you feeling?"

"Tired."She smiled, but I could tell she wasn't lying.She winced.

"Sis!What's the matter?"

"Nothing.I'm fine, Honey – the baby just kicked."

"Dude – he _kicks_ you?"

"Yes!" she laughed."Not like you kick a football or anything.I guess she might be getting restless in there.You want to feel it?"

"Uh…I guess."I really couldn't get used to the idea that there was a little sprite inside my sister.

"Go on, Enzo." Bob urged."It's pretty alphanumeric."

So Dot put my hand on her tummy, and I held it there for a few nanos and nothing happened.I looked up at Dot and shrugged."Just wait."

And sure enough, after a while, I felt a little kick, like someone tapping on my hand real softly."Dude!"

"Pretty amazing, huh?" Bob smiled.

"Man!That's… That's…"I didn't know what to say.There was a little baby in there, and I could actually feel it moving around.It was like the first time the whole thing felt real to me.

Dot kissed me on the head again."Honey, Bob and I have something we want to talk about with you."

I didn't want to look away from Dot's tummy, what was happening was so amazing – but I looked up at her."What?"

"Enzo, you can see that Dot is getting pretty close to her time." Bob said."It's getting harder and harder for her to get around and do stuff on her own."

"Yeah.I guess."

"Well, you know Phong is doing a good job taking care of things at the P.O., and AndrAIa is helping him a lot.And Matrix is taking care of system security."

"Sure."

Bob and Dot shared a look, which was never a good sign for me."Enzo Sweetie, I need someone here with me to help with chores around the diner.And to help me in the apartment, because it's hard for me to make meals and do things around the house.Bob and I need you to come straight from school and help me around here as much as you can."

"I'll be here, too – Enzo.As much as I can.But I'll still need to take care of games and help out at the P.O.We're in constant contact with Laser and the war with Daemon is really heating up out there.I have to be involved as much as possible."

"_You'll_…Take care of games?"

Dot grabbed my hand."Bob can handle the games by himself.I really need you here to help me.And to be here in case there's an emergency, you know?"She took my chin in her hand."I know how much you love going into games with Bob.And you're doing wonderfully.Isn't he, Bob?"

"He's doing great.A credit to his uniform."

"We just need you to make a sacrifice, Sweetie – not go into games for a little while – until the baby is born and we're settled in.Will you do that for me?"

I sat there for a while, not knowing what to say.What _could_ I say?What could I do – not help Dot?Going into the games had been the best thing during the whole time Dot was pregnant, when no one was paying too much attention to me 'cause they were all so busy.My training was totally important to me.But what could I do?"Sure, Dot.I'll stay here and help you."

"Thank you."She hugged me."It won't be for that long, Enzo.You'll be back training with Bob before you know it."

"It's OK..."

"Good job, Cadet." Bob smiled."We all have to make sacrifices right now – I'm proud of you."

"Thanks."I smiled at him, but I don't know how convincing it was.I wasn't too excited at the idea of coming straight home from school every cycle and doing housework and working at the diner.But what could I do?The baby was coming and we all had to make sacrifices…

So that's how it went for a few minutes.Dot got fatter and fatter, and when I wasn't in school I was at the diner or in the apartment, helping Dot or Cecil.The toughest part was when the game cubes came down – my codes were telling me to go, that I was letting Bob down and not doing my duty.But what could I do?Dot needed me.

And User, did she ever.She just kept getting bigger and bigger till it got to the point where she couldn't even get up out of a chair by herself sometimes.I did the best I could, but I don't know how good it was.I've never been very good at cleaning and that junk, although I'm actually not a bad cook.Dot sure asked me to cook some weird stuff, though.No wonder she felt sick in the mornings.

Finally, the inevitable cycle came and Dot was ready to have her baby.Bob came and woke me up early in the morning, I don't remember what day it was but it was definitely the minute-end 'cause there was no school.I rebooted out of my pajamas and went out into the living room, and Dot was sitting on the couch and sweating a lot.Boy, she didn't look good.I sat next to her and grabbed her hand and she smiled at me, but she showed a lot more teeth than she usually does.

Bob and I each grabbed an arm and we real slowly helped her onto her zip board, which made me think of how Dot always said there was no zipping in the house which was a funny thing to think about but I guess I was scared so my processor threw that in to distract me.Anyway, Dot was too sick to even walk up the stairs to the diner, so she needed to zip.And we sort of steered her up and through the diner and out to Bob's car, which for once didn't break down thank the User and the next thing you know we were at the medical unit at the P.O.

Oh, and Matrix and AndrAIa were there – I forgot to say that.Bob called them on a vidwindow and told them to meet us there.Phong came out and he was all calm like he usually is, which is more than I can say for Bob and me.Dot was in a lot of pain – Bob said it was her contractions starting, which I never heard of but he said it meant she was ready to have the baby.

Phong took Dot's hand and smiled.I guess on top of everything else, he's a medical program too and he was gonna be in charge."I believe we should get you to the delivery room, Child.I think it is time."

Dot grimaced and nodded, and they started to walk off real slowly.Bob and AndrAIa got up to go with them, and everybody forgot all about me.And Matrix too, I guess.I hadn't really thought about it but I wanted to be with Dot when it happened, even if I really didn't want to see it."Wait!Can't I come, too?"

Bob shook his head."No, Enzo.You wait here with your brother.We'll let you know when the baby comes."

"But…I've been helping Dot got ready and everything… And I've known her longer than any of you guys!"

Matrix grabbed my hand."Come on, Enzo.That's no place for a little sprite.It's no place for _me_."

I pulled away."No!Dot-"

"Enzo, it can't be too crowded in there." AndrAIa smiled."Bob has to be there – he's the father.And I need to be in there because I think Dot needs another girl with her and besides, someone needs to assist Phong.Just try to understand, OK?"

"But-"

"I'll be fine, Sweetie." Dot said through gritted teeth."I promise.Oooh!Ow…"

I ran over to her and grabbed her hand.If they weren't letting me in, I could at least do that much. I kissed her on the cheek."OK, then.Good…Good luck, OK?"

"I'll be just fine.It'll all be over soon enough and you can see the baby.OK?"

"OK." I smiled, but I was still totally offlined about the whole thing.

"Good luck, Dot." Matrix whispered.They went off, and I went over and sat next to Matrix."Cursors and crashes!"

"Don't worry, Sprout.She'll be OK."

"I know… And don't call me that!"

He messed up my hair."We're lucky not to be in there.I bet it's gonna be pretty gross."

"It's not fair!I'm the one who's been with Dot all the time, helping her, all that stuff!I'm her brother!Whenever anything important happens they always leave me out of it!I hate being a kid…"

"Hey – I been there." Matrix sighed.

"It just isn't fair, Matrix!Why do I always get left out?"

"I know it's not fair, Enzo.But I don't think you know what it's gonna be like.Dot'll be in a lot of pain – she'll be going through a lot.I don't think she wants you to see her like that."

"But…"

"This is going to be very hard for Dot as it is, Enzo.I know you think you can handle it, but if you were in there Dot would be worried about you on top of everything else she's dealing with.You don't want to make this any harder for her than it already is, do you?"

"I…Of course I don't!But-"

"So you did the right thing.The main thing is that Dot be as comfortable as possible, right?Isn't that what's most important?"

I knew I was beaten."Yeah." I sighed."That's what's most important."

"Good boy."He wrapped his arm around me and started walking off."Believe me Kiddo, it's not going to be any fun in there – we're both better off.C'mon – I'll buy you some breakfast…"

I don't know exactly how long the whole thing took.Matrix and I had breakfast and we walked around for a while and talked a little, not too much.We sat down on a couch in this little room they have in the med unit, and I guess I fell asleep.Whenever I sit for long enough next to a big person, I always seem to fall over against them and go to sleep.

The next thing I remember is feeling someone stroking my cheek, real softly.I opened my eyes, and my head was on Matrix' shoulder and it was AndrAIa.She smiled when she saw I was awake."Hi, Honey.Sorry to wake you."

"It's all right…"

"You ready to go see the baby?"

"What?!" I sat right up."It's over?Is Dot OK?"

"She's fine."AndrAIa laughed her musical laugh and took my hand."C'mon- let's go see her."

Matrix fell in a few steps behind us."How come you never wake _me_ up like that?"

"Oh shut up, Sparky."

"'Move your bitmap, Chubby' – that's all I ever get…"  
  


I pretty much tuned them out.I only had one thing on my mind."AndrAIa, is Dot OK?Did everything go all right?"

"Dot's just fine.There were a few difficulties but nothing unusual, from what Phong says.I think she might've broke Bob's hand from squeezing it so hard."

"So – what is it?" Matrix asked.

"It's a baby, Basic!"

"You know what I mean, Andri!Is it a boy or a girl?"

"Wait and see."She grinned, winked at me and opened the door to Dot's room.I took a deep breath and followed her inside.

Bob was sitting in a chair with his eyes closed when we came in, looking very tired.Phong was standing next to Dot's docking bay, talking real softly to her.She had what looked like a folded up blanket in her arms."Look I brought, Dot.Our new uncles."

She looked up and smiled at us."Thanks, AndrAIa.Come on over, boys.Don't be shy."

I was incredibly nervous as I walked over to the bed, Matrix' heavy footsteps right behind me.I scooted up onto the bed and kissed Dot on the cheek, which was real sweaty, and she shifted the blanket in her arms.I saw a tiny patch of aqua skin through the folds of the blanket."Is…Is that it?"

"_It_?" Dot giggled, pretending to be mad."My baby is not an it!Enzo, meet your new nephew."

"It's a boy!I knew it!" Matrix laughed.He leaned over me and kissed Dot's forehead.

"A boy?It's a boy?"I heard myself giggle.I think it's what I'd really been hoping all along."Alphanumeric!"

"This is an auspicious day." Phong said."There has not been a sprite born in Mainframe for many an hour."

"His name is Mac." Dot whispered."Would you like to hold him?"

"I like that name.Short names are a good thing." I heard Bob say.

As for me, I swallowed pretty hard a couple of times.I'd never really been around a baby before, much less Dot's baby.I was a little scared."It's OK, Sweetie.Just hold your arms out."

"Like this?"I held my arms out like I imagined you would when you were holding a baby.Dot brushed the blanket away and Mac's face appeared.He looked like a shriveled up null!I hope I didn't show it, but I was a little shocked.Is that what newborn sprites are supposed to look like?

"Yes, that's good.Just put one arm behind his neck and hold his head up.Just like I'm doing, see?There you go."She handed him to me and just like that, I was holding my nephew.

I was shaking pretty hard, but I think I managed to hold him OK.He was kinda asleep, his eyes were mostly closed.I just couldn't get over how small he was."Is this OK?"

"Oh, Bob." Dot said real softly.I felt a hand tousling my hair and I knew it was Bob's.

"Hi, Mac." I whispered."You're a tiny little thing, aren't you?"

"So were you, Enzo.I held you on the cycle you were born, just like you're holding him.He looks just like you did."

"Ugh!Really?"

I regretted it as soon as I said it, but Dot just laughed and patted my cheek."Give your brother a chance now."

Matrix said next to me, looking just as nervous as I'd been."I dunno Dot – I might drop him or-"

"Don't be silly, Enzo.Just hold your arms out like your brother.I think you could hold him in one hand!"

"Uh… Yeah."Matrix sort of smiled weakly and held his arms out.I handed Mac to him, gently as I could.The kid looked ridiculously small with Matrix holding him, but he did OK.His face just kind of melted when he looked at the baby."Hi, Mac."

"Give you any ideas, Sparky?" AndrAIa said softly.Matrix looked alarmed for a nano and didn't say anything.

Once Matrix took the baby I realized I was breathing really hard, I'd been so scared.I took a deep breath and felt someone squeeze my hand.I'd forgotten Dot was there for a nano.She smiled up at me and I tried to smile back."Y-You're OK?"

"I'm just fine, Sweetie."

I really did love my nephew, but it was hard to make myself worry about anything but Dot.I was totally relieved that it was all over, and she was all right.I hugged her hard and put my head on her shoulder."I'm glad you're OK.I was worried about you."

"Thanks for worrying.And thanks for helping me so much over the last few minutes."

"Dot…"It was a pretty heavy nano for me, I have to admit.There was a lot of emotional stuff going on and I didn't really understand some of it.I just knew how much I loved Dot, that was totally clear.And I told her.

"I know, Angel.I love you too."She kissed me on the forehead like she always did, and like always it felt perfect.But there a lot of other things going on in my processor and like I said, I didn't really understand a lot of them. 


	2. Branching Out

CHAPTER II

CHAPTER II

** **

**BRANCHING OUT**

Dot and Mac stayed at the P.O. for a couple of cycles, just so Dot could rest and Phong could keep his eye on them.AndrAIa came over to the apartment and helped us get it all ready for them, and they set up a crib in Bob and Dot's room for the baby.I wasn't really sure if that was going to be permanent, but we didn't have an extra room in the apartment.I tried not to think about that and I didn't dare mention it anyway, because I didn't want everyone to think I was selfish.

Every time I saw Dot for those first couple of cycles I felt like laughing, it was so good to see her smiling and OK.I guess I didn't even realize how much I'd been worrying about her, but it'd been a whole lot.But after the first few milliseconds I'd start to get these weird feelings like I did at the hospital after Mac was born.It's hard to describe – it's

like I was nervous but that's not exactly it, I wasn't really nervous.Or scared, or sad or mad…I just had weird feelings that I didn't understand but I tried not to let it show.

When we finally brought them home from the hospital it was in the afternoon, after school, and Matrix and Andri stayed with us for a while.After they left, Bob and I kinda played with the baby even though he really didn't do much of anything, then Dot said she was tired and she and Mac went into the bedroom to take a nap.

I realized that Bob and I hadn't been alone for a long time, for sure since the baby and it seemed like a long time before that, too.I sat next to him on the couch and I had some of those weird scraggy feelings again.Bob looked tired, but he was definitely more relaxed now that the birth was all over.Neither one of us said anything for a little bit.Finally I looked up at him and asked him how it felt.

"How's what feel?"

"You know – being a…A father and everything."

He looked a little surprised for a nano, then he smiled at me."I really don't feel any different."

"Really?"

"Yeah.Because in my heart, nothing's really changed.I'm not going anyplace I haven't already been.You know?"

"Yeah…"I digested that for a few nanos."Bob, when d'you think I can start going into games with you again?"For some reason, that was feeling really important to me.

"Pretty soon, Kiddo.I think once we've had a few cycles to get settled you can start again."

"Really?You mean it?"

"I don't see why not."I think Bob could tell I was feeling off-line about something.He laughed and punched me on the shoulder."We're becoming quite the little family, huh?"

"Bob?"

"Yeah." He grinned."Me with two boys, huh?Who would've believed that?" 

I just kind of stared at him when he said that."Bob?"

"You know how lucky I feel?To have an incredible woman like your sister in my life, and two boys to watch grow up.That's pretty amazing."He wrapped his arm around me."You're going to be an awfully important sprite in Mac's life, Enzo – you know that, don't you?"

"I… I guess."

"He's gonna look up to you.Want to do the things you do, even if he can't.It's only natural that he would. Try to be patient with him, OK?Try to understand the way he looks at the world."

It was hard for me to think that far ahead right now."I will, Bob.I promise."

"I'm awfully proud of you.You're 1.2 now, growing up.The way you pitched in and helped Dot when she needed you.I know it wasn't easy to put your training on hold.But you did it – you came through in crunch time."

"I guess."I wasn't sure exactly why he was telling me all this, but it was hitting me right where those weird feelings had been.

"I'm proud of the way your training is going, too.I always knew you'd be a good student, but you surprised me.I never figured you'd pick it up as fast as you have.Like you were born to do it."

"Bob, do you really mean that?"It's not like I thought Bob would lie to me or anything, but I was feeling really insecure about everything at that nano.That's the word – _insecure_.That's what I was feeling.

"Course I do."He ruffled my hair a little bit."I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it.You're one hell of a fine cadet."

"Thanks." I sighed.Delete it, it felt good to hear him say it.

"You know Enzo, I never really told you, but…You deciding you wanted to be like me – to be a Guardian…That means an awful lot to me, Tiger.You know that?"

"Really?"

"Sure.I'm flattered, but it's more than that.It makes me proud of who I am – that someone like you would want to do what I do.You're a great kid – you could do whatever you want to do.I think its pixelacious that being a guardian is how you want to spend your life."

"I…Thanks."He smiled, and I smiled back."Ever since you came here it's all I ever wanted to do."

"There you go.I always loved being a guardian, Tiger – there was never a nano I wished I'd picked some other way to spend my life.But until you and Dot, I never had anybody to share it with.That's why I fought for so long to get back to Mainframe – to save it.Because this is where my life was, from the nano I came here.You and Dot were my life.Do you understand what I'm trying to say?"

I couldn't really find any words, so I just nodded and tried to smile again.He squeezed his arm around me a little tighter."I just want you to know that's never going to change, Enzo.We'll always have it.It'll always be what keeps us together – the three of us.OK?"

"OK, Bob."

"OK, you." He chuckled."You hungry?Want me to fix us some dinner?"

"No, I'm fine Bob.Thanks."I realized I was pretty tired, and I put my head down on his chest.Those feelings were still inside me, but they felt a little farther away, like Bob had given them a hard shove until I almost couldn't see them any more but they were still there.I thought about that for a few nanos, and before I knew it I fell asleep.

Having Mac around totally changed my life, in every possible way I could think of.He woke me up at night with his crying, pretty much every night. It seemed like I never slept straight through anymore.Dot had to spend so much time taking care of him that she hardly ever had time to cook for Bob and me, so we either ate at the diner or else made something ourselves.I didn't seem to see Dot that much – even when she was around, I hardly saw her.It was like Mac needed her every nano for something or the other.It wasn't his fault – I guess that's just how little babies are.

The only times that felt like before were the games.When game cubes dropped it was just Bob and me, like always.The rest of the net didn't exist – all we had to worry about was working together and winning the game.It was a totally alphanumeric feeling to be in the games with Bob, like being totally free.And he was letting me do more and more, too, as I got better.And afterwards, we'd always have an energy shake at Al's or the Diner and talk about the game.I never wanted those nanos to end.

One cycle a few minutes after Mac was born Dot was taking care of him in their bedroom and I came in to watch, which I did sometimes.Even if Dot was busy I still wanted to just _see_ her sometimes – just so I knew she was still real, still a part of my life.And it was kinda cool to watch her with Mac, because I'd never seen anything remotely like him before.He's a very weird little sprite – I guess all babies are, probably.

So anyways, she was taking care of him and I was just sitting on her bed, watching them, and she turned around and smiled at me like nothing was any different than it's ever been.That was when she told me she was gonna have to teach me how to baby-sit.

"What?"

"You heard me, Sport.I think you're old enough to have a little responsibility around here."

"But…I have responsibility in the games and everything-"

"That's different."She hoisted the baby up out of his crib and sat down next to me on the bed."Soon enough Mac will be old enough for us to leave him once in a while - it's not fair for us to always ask AndrAIa and Matrix to baby-sit.You'll be 1.3 before you know it – it'll be good for you.And I'll pay you."

"Really?"The whole idea sounded pretty dubious to me.Matrix and Andri had been baby-sitting_, me _before Mac was born – not that I liked Dot thinking I needed a sitter.__"But what if he gets sick or something?I wouldn't know what to do!"

"I'll teach you.It won't be hard." Dot smiled.She held out the baby and I took him in my arms, awkwardly.I was still kind of nervous holding him, to be honest."See?Already he loves you Enzo, – look at that smile!"

"He doesn't even know who I am, I bet.I'm just some big blob to him."

"Oh Enzo!He knows you're his uncle.I'm sure of it – I know you recognized me when you were a few minutes old."

"Really?"Mac was sort of making funny cooing noises with his mouth while I held him.

"Sure." Dot chuckled.She tweaked the baby on the nose and ruffled my hair."I'll teach you the basics.And we'll make sure you know where we are if there's an emergency.It'll be fine, you'll see."

"If you say so."The whole thing sounded pretty dubious to me.

"It'll be good for you to spend the time together, so he can bond with you.You want that, don't you?Don't you want you and Mac to be close like you and I are?"

"I…Sure I do."I _did_.But that was a funny question, somehow – it didn't feel right to me.Something else didn't feel right either, right about then."Hey!I think he's… he's-"

"That'll be lesson one, then." Dot sighed, patting my cheek."Changing a diaper."

"Ick!I don't wanna do that!"

"Well, I wasn't so keen on helping change _your _diapers either, but-"

"Dot!"

"All right, that's enough.I have one baby – I don't need two."So that's when she taught me how to change Mac's diaper.I won't talk about it because I don't even like to _think_ about it – but it was totally gross.If Dot was trying to convince me to want to baby-sit she definitely picked the wrong way to do it.But I did baby-sit him sometimes as it turned out, and it wasn't totally basic.And I liked having a few extra credits in my pocket, too…

Dot loved taking care of the baby.She got tired but she never seemed to get angry with him, no matter how much he cried or wet himself or fussed or just generally needed attention – which was all the time.Sometimes it seemed like she was all used up after dealing with him – he'd go to sleep and all of the tiredness she'd been holding inside her just came out and she had nothing left for me.

After a while she started taking Mac to the P.O with her so she could work, maybe when he was fifteen minutes old or so.Dot loved to work – she loved being the Command.Com and I could tell how much she'd missed it.She'd take Mac with her and set him up in her office and do as much work as she could between his crying fits.Sometimes if there were no games for a while Bob would come by and take Mac for a walk or something, or he and I would take Mac to the park or the beach, and Dot would try and catch up on as much as she could while she had the chance.

One morning Dot was sitting at the breakfast table when I got up.I didn't see Bob or Mac anywhere, which was weird, because Dot always had Mac in the kitchen with her in the morning.It wasn't a school day and I'd slept late, though, so I thought maybe he was already taking a nap or something and I asked her where he was.

"Matrix and Andri came by and took him the park.They haven't spent any time with him for a while, so I said it was OK."

"Where's Bob?"

"Catching up on system maintenance with Phong.Looks like it's just you and me this morning."

"Really?"I felt a weird kind of rush go through me when she told me.

"Or should I say 'this afternoon', late as you slept!I thought you were never getting up.Planning on wearing your PJs all day?"

"Sorry." I mumbled.I sat next to her at the table and grinned like a little kid.I couldn't believe Dot and me where sitting together and there was no one else around.It almost felt like a dream, it was so weird.

"You!" She giggled, and tweaked me on the nose."What would you like for breakfast?"

"Could we go out?"The words just came out of me before I had a chance to think about them."Could we go get pancakes like we used to, sometimes?And then play jetball or go circuit racing?"

She lifted an eyebrow like she was a little surprised."I suppose so.We haven't done that for a long time."

"Alphanumeric!"

"OK.Go get ready and we'll leave in a few milliseconds."

When we got out onto Baudway Dot asked me if I wanted to zip, and I said no, I wanted to walk.She just shrugged and we started off.I grabbed her hand and we didn't really say anything, she just looked over at me and smiled a couple of times.

We went to a neat little café in the Kits Sector, a place where we started going for breakfast sometimes when I was real small.We hadn't been there for a long time but I really liked it.When Dot and I used to go out and eat we didn't like to eat at the Diner even though the food was free, 'cause it didn't really feel like going out if you worked in the place you were eating.

We sat at a table in the café, which was really crowded but we didn't have to wait.The dedicated server took our order – I ordered a tall stack of apple pancakes and a side of potatoes, just like I used to.The server went away and Dot and I sort of looked at each other for a nano like we'd forgotten how to talk to each other and finally Dot asked me what I'd been doing in school.

After Dot asked me I started to tell her about a programming class I was taking, which was actually kinda cool unlike pretty much all my other classes.It's like all the words I'd been saving up just decided to come out all at once.See, when I was a little kid sometimes I'd get excited and I'd just start talking and I couldn't really stop.It's like some little part of me knows I'm doing it and tells me I should shut up or at least feel silly, but I can't and I don't.I'd just keep talking and talking until something stopped me.

_ _

Well I hadn't really done that for a while but I was doing it then, I'm sure.I don't even remember what I was talking about but that happened a lot of the time anyway.I think I got onto programming and what they were able to do with organizers and stuff and how neat they were and I just kept going and going for I don't know how long and seeing Dot's face and always wanting to see it and then I sort of realized that she was grinning at me and I finally stopped."What?"

She reached out and rubbed my cheek, real softly."Nothing, Sweetie."

I felt myself blushing."You're not listening to what I'm saying at all, are you?"

"Not really."

"Crash!Why didn't you tell me to stop?"

She laughed, but not a laughing at me kind of laugh."I don't know why.I liked listening to you, I guess."

"But you don't even know what I said!"

"I don't care, I suppose.I still liked it."She leaned across the table and kissed me on the cheek and the server brought our food.It was one of the best breakfasts I ever had – I don't know why but it just was.Afterwards we were going to play jetball but Dot wanted to check on Mac, and when she called AndrAIa said he had a slight temperature and we had to go over and pick him up.I don't know why, but I remember that morning like it just happened.It's weird, but I just do.

Things sort of settled into a routine with Mac around.He'd get bigger and bigger, but little by little so you hardly noticed it except sometimes you'd look at him and be surprised for a nano how big he was, like he'd snuck up on you.I got used to spending more time on my own, which I guess was natural.And there were the games…

The games were the one part of my life where I felt totally comfortable.I could _feel_ myself getting better every time a game cube dropped – I stopped having to ask Bob as many questions, I started to anticipate things in the game before they even happened.Bob and me were like, totally in tune with each other – for the first time I felt like we were a _team _for real.He was letting me do stuff, make mistakes sometimes but mostly do stuff pretty well.But then the games would be won and we'd be back in Mainframe and things still never felt totally right.

The other thing that was happening was the war with Daemon.I wish I could say more about it but Bob and Dot and the others tried to keep the details from me as much as possible.Bob or Phong would talk to Laser and the others on Gallifrey Seven a lot, via encrypted messages.They'd get updates on how things were going and at first things were pretty bad.You could always tell how bad from the adults' mood.When they were real bad they didn't tell me anything – they'd get mad if I even asked.

But slowly things started to get better.Mouse had come up with an antiviral program that Daemon hadn't been able to break, so they sent it to a bunch of clean systems and it totally stopped Daemon's army in their tracks.I could tell things were going good because Bob or Matrix would tell me little bits of stuff, like they were feeling really giddy and they couldn't keep it to themselves.

There were still a lot of infected systems out there, and no one had been able to figure out a way to liberate them except by force, and we didn't have enough force to be able to do that.But Daemon wasn't able to infect any new systems, and everyone felt a lot better about the whole war because of that.And then there was the Academy – Laser graduated his first group of Guardian cadets, and that was a very big deal.They went out, back to their home systems or to the supercomputer, all of them ready to make things even harder for Daemon.It was a totally cool thought.

My birthday was coming up soon – I was gonna be 1.3.That's a big one – I'd be a teenager.Bob or Matrix or Andri would crack jokes about it sometimes and I'd be embarrassed, but Dot never joked about it.I wasn't sure how _I_ felt – I was happy I was getting bigger and stronger, and Bob was trusting me a lot.Letting me do more.But nothing ever felt simple to me anymore.I remember once telling Matrix he made everything too complicated, but here I was starting to do the same thing!I felt like I was turning into a different person – I wasn't sure if it was Matrix or someone else completely.But like I said, nothing ever felt simple.

I noticed that weird things - little things - would make me really happy.And little things would really bother me too, make me feel like I wanted to cry and I wasn't even sure why I did.I'd get really frustrated sometimes for no reason – at least no reason I can remember – and just have to go away and be by myself, or just sit somewhere and wrestle with Frisket and not talk to anyone.It never used to take much to make me happy – all I wanted was to have fun and do exciting stuff and that was enough.But sometimes that wasn't enough anymore, and I wasn't sure why.

One cycle after a game Bob and I walked into the apartment and Dot was sitting on the sofa, changing Mac's diaper.I said 'Hi' to her and she smiled, then she and Bob exchanged one of those quick looks they think I never see and I always do.It didn't take much to set off my mind to wandering around then, so I went into the kitchen to get a drink and think.Whenever Bob and Dot did one of those looks it was usually bad for me.I might have said that already.

When I came back into the living room Dot was all done with Mac and he was in his playpen, and Bob was sitting next to her on the sofa.She patted the sofa and called me over to sit down.I knew she was gonna say that before she even said it."What's up?"

"Just wanna talk to you, that's all.How was your game?"

"Um – it was OK.Good.I guess."

"Enzo did most of the work." Bob grinned."I hardly ever have to do anything in a game any more – I'm gonna get lazy at this rate."

"You know that's not true, Bob…"

"Good, good."Dot was acting in a kind of weird, flat way.Like she wasn't really all there."You know me, Enzo – I believe in getting to the point.Bob and I have something we need to discuss with you."

My stomach always fell whenever I heard that."Sure.What's up?"

"You want to take over?" Dot asked Bob.He nodded.

"Tiger, you don't need me to tell you how well you're doing in the games.You know that, right?"

"Yeah…I guess.I thought I was doing OK, but you're the expert."

He chuckled and tousled my hair."Well, I don't know about that last part but you're definitely doing really well.I'm proud of you.In fact, you're doing so well that I'm beginning to think there isn't a lot more I can teach you."

Now I was really confused."But Bob…I mean – that's not true!"

"Well…Maybe it is, maybe it isn't."Mac started crying and Dot stood up without saying anything and went over to his playpen.Bob stared at her for a nano and turned back to me.He slid over next to me."Kiddo, you know the Daemon war is going better, right?"

I did, but I was feeling a little testy."How would I – you guys never want to tell me anything!"

He smiled."You always know more than we think you do.Don't pretend you don't.Besides – I told you about Mouse's antiviral program and how successful it's been."

I looked over at Dot, who was kinda bouncing Mac up and down and whispering to him, trying to get him to stop crying."Yeah.I know…"

"This thing is a long way from over.It's going to be a long, tough road.But we've turned the tide, Enzo – I really believe it.And because of Mouse's work we've made real progress – we've established a secure communications network throughout the free net.And that's not all – now we can travel safely between free systems."

"Bob, that's alphanumeric.But why are you telling me all this now?You guys nevertell me anything."

Dot had calmed Mac down, and she put him in his playpen again and he rolled over and went to sleep, like it was nothing.It was amazing how babies could do that.She came and sat next to Bob."Enzo, just let Bob talk, all right?"

"I _am_ letting him talk!Cursors and crashes…"

"It's OK." Bob patted my knee."I'm getting to the point Enzo, I promise.Some things have changed.You're 1.3 now – well, almost.You're not the little boy you were when I first promoted you."I blushed – I didn't like to hear 'little boy' and me referred to in the same sentence."We've got secure communications and travel now.And the Academy isn't what it was when Laser founded it.It's not like before Daemon – not yet.But it's getting there."

"The Academy?"Suddenly I was breathing hard, like I'd been running the whole time Bob was talking.

"Enzo, you remember how we talked about you making decisions in your own life?" Dot asked."Well, this is one of those times."

"Dot?"

"It might just be time, Tiger." Bob smiled."You're almost as old as some of the youngest cadets there now – not quite, but almost.You're damn good – you're getting better every cycle.And Dot and I are both convinced you'd be safe at the Academy.Besides – we can communicate with you now and get you out of there quickly – if we need to."

"Wait!Wait a nano…"I remember wanting to slow time down, thinking everything was moving too fast."You…You want me to go to the Academy, Bob?Now?"

"Well…Soon.And it's not a matter of my wanting it, Enzo – it's a matter of _you_ wanting it.All I'm saying is we think you're ready for the Academy – and we think it's ready for you."

"Bob, I…"As usual, it seemed like I had no idea when big stuff was gonna happen – it just hit me like an ABC.

"What do you think about it, Enzo?" Dot said.She'd been really quiet during all this.

"The Academy.Wow…"I wasn't really sure what I thought about it, but that was no surprise after the way I'd been feeling.I never really felt sure of anything.Part of me was really excited, part of me was scared, part of me was sad.I didn't know which part to listen to.I hadn't thought seriously about the Academy for a long time – since Laser had been in Mainframe.

"It'd be a two hour program, Tiger – that's what they're doing now, because of the war.Used to be three.Two hours at the Academy, and since you'd be underage, a three-hour apprenticeship under an established Guardian."He winked."I think I could pull a few strings with management and get you assigned to Mainframe for that."

"Two hours?And then… Back here?"Bob nodded.I still didn't really know how I felt, so naturally I turned to the sprite I'd always turned to, since I was a little tiny kid."Dot?What do you think?Should I go?"

She smiled a little and didn't say anything for just a nano."Enzo…It's really up to you.I'll support you whatever you decide."

"D-Dot?"

She ran her hand over her face, so fast I almost didn't notice it."Yes, Enzo.You know I'd miss you – we all would.But if you really want to be a Guardian you're going to have to go for training sooner or later.Like I said – I'll support you, whatever you decide."

I nodded and smiled a little, but I felt empty inside – like I'd just been in a fight or a game or something, and surrendered.Bob grabbed my shoulder."There's no rush, Enzo – you can take some time and thi-"

"I'll go." I said, so loud and fast that I surprised myself.A lot.

"Enzo?"

"I'll go." I sighed.I closed my eyes."You're right – if I want to be a Guardian I've got to go to the Academy.There's no reason to wait any more."

I felt Bob squeeze my shoulder.I could hear in his voice he was surprised, too."If you're sure-"

"I'm sure."

"Good…Good, then.We can talk about the details later – the semester doesn't start for a few minutes."

"OK."I opened my eyes at last."Thanks, Bob."

"No problem, Kiddo.How 'bout this kid, huh Dot?"

She smiled."Yep. You're…You're going to have a great time, Enzo.I'm happy for you - It's wonderful."

"Yeah…Thanks.Thanks, Dot."

So that was that.I was going to the Academy, where five milliseconds earlier the idea of leaving home had never even entered my mind.Ever since the reboot it seemed like my life was always just drifting along without much happening and then being knocked on my bitmap without any warning.

I could tell Bob and Dot were surprised I'd made up my mind so quickly.To be honest, I was too.I wasn't even really sure why I did – I mean, it was probably the most important decision Dot had ever let me make.But somehow, sitting there talking to her, I just knew it was time for me to leave.

I had my birthday party a few cycles after I found out about the Academy.Everyone was there and I got a lot of cool presents, and it was kinda fun while it lasted.The best one was a guitar from Bob.I knew Matrix had one, but he never played it and I'd pretty much figured out why, even though no one talked about it much.Bob promised he'd give me lessons and it was a pretty cool cycle.

But it was hard for me to relax and enjoy it knowing all the changes that were gonna happen.I knew as soon as the party was over everyone would leave and Dot would go to take care of Mac and I'd go to my room and just start thinking about everything all over again.

The strangest thing is, I wasn't really scared.I mean, I was a little bit – OK.I'd never left home before and I was still kind of a kid and that did scare me a little.But not like I expected it to.I knew Bob was pretty much right when he said I was doing better in the games – I felt it.He'd started teaching me before I was 1.1 and I'd learned an incredible amount from him.I was pretty sure I could hold my own with first-hour students in the Academy.

Besides, Bob had told me a lot about life at the Academy so I kinda felt like I knew what to expect.There would be hard work – physical training, exercise - probably more than I'd ever done.A lot of classroom stuff that wasn't all that different from what I was doing now – plus a few specialized game classes, which I just knew were going to be incredibly pixelacious.And all of the game training – I knew I could handle that.I wasn't even scared about having a roommate and meeting other sprites may own age for the first time.Well – not _that_ scared.

But I wasn't that excited about it either.I mean, how many times had I wished I had some kids my own age to play with?I was going to a place with a bunch of kids – Bob said there were over 100 students now and even though most of them were a lot older than me, a lot were 1.6 or younger.It was going to be a totally new experience for me.Sometimes I'd think about it and wonder what it'd be like but it didn't really excite me or scare me, which was basic – I figured it should do one or the other or maybe both.It was like I was watching all this stuff about to happen to someone else.A big part of me felt like I wasn't there, like I'd already left.

There was a part of me that wanted to go to someone and talk.Just talk – I wasn't even sure what about.Just talk and not worry about anything.But another part of me didn't want to do that.As I'd gotten bigger I didn't want to go to another person when I was offline like I had when I was a kid – when I got confused or depressed I just wanted to be by myself.And that was pretty easy to do, as busy as everybody was.

I saw Dot in the kitchen a few cycles after the birthday party.She was busy making up some formula for Mac and she didn't really notice me when I came in.I sat down at the table and stared at her for a few nanos with my chin on hands."What're you doing back there?"

"Sorry!Didn't mean to scare you."

"You didn't scare me.I just wondered why you're sitting there, not saying anything."

"I dunno.I guess I don't have anything to say."

"Hmmm."She tested a drop of the formula on her wrist and turned to look at me."What's with you anyway?"

"Nothing."She shook her head at me and headed towards the living room.I got up and followed a few steps behind her."Gonna feed the baby, huh?"

"Very clever of you to figure that out."She held out the bottle and I took it from her, then she reached into the playpen and picked up Mac.He was making gurgling noises and he smiled at me, so I automatically smiled back.You couldn't help it.Dot sat down on the sofa and I sat next to her."Bottle, please."

"OK."I handed it to her and she brought it right up to the baby's mouth.She got him in just the right position and tucked her arm behind his neck and he started drinking.Dot took a deep breath and leaned back."Takin' care of him is a lot of work, huh?"

"Nothing's getting past you today, is it?"

"I guess."Dot shook her head again and frowned at me.I wanted to say something, but I just couldn't get any words to come out so I just sat there and watched Mac drink his formula.

I guess Dot got tired of the silence after a while."Well…Have you thought much about what you're going to bring with you to the Academy?"

"Uh…Not really.Just some clothes I guess.And stuff.And my surfboard."

"Hmmm.You don't seem very excited about the whole thing, I must say.Aren't you excited to be going at last?"

"Sure."I managed to smile.I stared at Mac for a nano."I guess I'm just worried.About you and everything."

"About _me_?Why are you worried about me?"

I gritted my teeth.I wanted to stop talking, but I couldn't."I just…I don't want you to be lonely and all."

"Enzo…Don't worry about that."

"But…"

"Enzo…"Something flashed in Dot's eyes and I could hear her draw in a breath, like she was about to talk for a long time.Her throat even tensed up.But she stopped.She looked down at Mac for a few nanos and adjusted the bottle.Then she looked up at me and smiled."You don't have to worry about that."

"I… don't?"

"Nah.I'll miss you, of course.We'll all miss you.But I've got so much going on around here with the baby, and the diner and being the Command.Com….Not to mention talking care of Bob which is like another baby sometimes!I won't have time to worry too much, I'll just be trying to keep up.I'll be surrounded by sprites all day long – of course I won't be lonely! So don't worry about it."

"Oh."I stared at her."Thanks, Sis.That's cool."

"So you just go and have a good time.I know how much this means to you, Sweetheart.You've worked so hard – you deserve it.Don't worry about me – I'll be just fine.OK?"

"OK."I smiled at her and she smiled back.I felt totally empty inside, like a web creature had drained all my energy."Thanks, Dot."

"You're welcome.Feel better?"

"Yeah."

"Good."Mac had finished his bottle, so Dot picked him up and put him on her shoulder.I went to my room and sat on the bed for a long time.

Bob and Dot hadn't been out together for a long time, so one night they had me baby-sit for Mac while they went out with Matrix and AndrAIa.I kind of dimly thought that I should be mad about that, but I didn't really care – I wanted to be alone anyway, and being with the baby was almost like being alone since he never asked me any questions.Besides, I didn't really mind baby-sitting.Other than the diapers it was kinda fun – almost.

Mac was about thirty minutes old by this time, and he was just starting to learn how to crawl on his own.It was amazing to watch him, struggling to do even the most basic thing.After we'd eaten our dinner and I'd changed him he started crying like he usually did so I picked him up out of his playpen and bounced him on my lap like Dot taught me.He got this kind of puzzled, pouty look on his face for a few nanos and I started talking to him.No real words, just kind of ooh-ing and ah-ing and making faces and he started to laugh, which he was doing more and more.

I laughed too, and I put him down on the floor so he could practice crawling.He looked back at me for a nano, like he wanted to make sure I was watching him, and then he took off.I just leaned on the coffee table with my chin in my hands and watched him.He'd go real slow, halfway falling over, then catch himself and keep crawling until he came up against an obstacle like the table or a wall.He's stare it for a nano and make little 'guh' type noises and then off he'd go, in another direction.It was pretty cool.

I let him do that for a while until I could see he was getting frustrated and I picked him up, under the arms, and carried him over to the couch.He kicked his little legs like he was amazed to be in the air, and then I sat down and put him on my lap, facing me."How you doing, Little Man?"

He didn't answer me – big surprise.He just kinda made a little laugh that sounded half like a hiccup.I giggled and mussed up his hair, which was dark-green like mine but had a little curl in it like Bob's."You sure are a funny little sprite, aren't you?Huh?"He laughed and I laughed and I hugged him a little and sort of stared at him.

"You know I'm going away, right?I'm going to the Academy.Didn't know that, huh?"He just stared at me like he was really trying to figure out what I was saying.Maybe he was, who knows?Looking at him, I could see why Dot was so crazy about him.He looked just like a cross between her and Bob, like he couldn't be anyone else's baby."You've got pretty great parents, you know that?"

It was weird, talking to him with no one else around."They're great, Mac.Dot's an incredible mom.She's gonna take really good care of you.Believe me, I know."Mac sort of smiled a little bit and yawned."You're in good hands, Tiger.You know that?"

I could tell he was tired out from his crying and his crawling, and all of a sudden I didn't feel much like talking anymore.I patted and rubbed his back which he always seemed to like, then I changed him into his PJs and put him to bed.I sat and stared at a vidscreen for a few nanos after that, but I didn't really feel like watching anything.So even though I wasn't tired, I switched on the baby monitor and took it into my room and went to bed.

I laid down in bed on my back and stared up at the ceiling for a long time.I know it was a long time 'cause I remember hearing Bob and Dot come in and hearing them talking outside my door.Eventually, I guess, I fell asleep.And the next cycle I ended up at the Principal Office, not really sure why I was there.And then I got the idea to go see my tree.

I don't know how long I'd been sitting in Phong's little room with the file reader.When I watched it the file hadn't seemed very long, but I sat afterwards and thought about the time I hurt my knee and about a bunch of other stuff, too so it could have been a while.Phong didn't say anything, though – he just waited.Like I said, nobody is as patient as Phong.

After I'd sat and thought about a bunch of stuff I opened a vidwindow and told Phong I was ready to go.I sat on the console and waited for him, which didn't take very long since he'd acted like he was ready when I called him.After what seemed like only a few nanos he whirred into the little room."Now then, young Guardian – you are ready to depart?"

"Yeah, Phong.Thanks, for...For letting me watch the file thing."

"Do not concern yourself with thanks.It was but nothing."He smiled and waved me to follow him, which I did."Did you find it interesting, Child?"

I thought about that for a nano."Yeah…I guess so, Phong.I – I'd like to think about it, I guess."

"Good, that is good, Child.Thinking is a most enlightening endeavor.However, always remember that the most important tool your body possesses for learning is not the brain, but the ears."

"Uh…Yeah, right.Listen, Phong?Would you mind taking me back to the conservatory for a nano before we go?"

"Of course not, young one. I was headed there anyway."He led me back to the garden and I don't know why, but I just wanted to take one more look at my tree before I left.So I did.Phong just stood off to the side and didn't say anything.

After a few nanos I turned to him."Thanks, Phong.Do me a favor?"

"Anything, Child."

"Would you, uh…Take care of it for me?While I'm gone?I don't know how long directory trees live but it'd be nice if it was here when I come home."

He nodded."You know I will do so, my boy.As I stated earlier – it is my supreme pleasure to tend your gift as it were my own."

"Cool."I coughed and looked at my feet, then held out my hand."You've been great to me, Phong.I appreciate it."

He shook my hand in his own spindly one."We will miss you in Mainframe, young Guardian.But this time we know full well that you will return."

"Thanks.I'll try to make you proud."

"Indeed, Child.Come – let us go, yes?I think perhaps there is someone else you yearn to speak to besides this weary old sprite."I nodded.There was, but I'd given up trying to figure out how Phong always knew this stuff.

I got back to the diner and walked in like I had a zillion times before, half-noticing how many customers there were and what Cecil was up to and checking to see if Dot and Bob were inside.They weren't.I almost grabbed an energy bar off the counter just by habit, but before it got there my brain told my hand I wasn't hungry and I went into the kitchen instead.I walked down the stairs and into the apartment.

I didn't see anyone when I first got there and I thought for a nano no one was home.Then I heard a noise from the bedroom and I walked over there.Dot was singing and had Mac on the bed, changing his clothes.Well, she wasn't really singing so much as humming but it was definitely musical.

I don't think she heard me come in and she had her back to me so I just stood there in the doorway, watching and listening to her.Mac was lying back on the bed just sort of staring up at Dot with his eyes real wide as she changed him and tweaked his nose and tickled his feet and he giggled.I felt like I could stand there all cycle.

Finally she picked him up and held him against her shoulder for a nano and walked him over to his crib.She set him down and whispered to him for a little bit and kissed him on the nose.When she stood up she turned around and saw me."Enzo!You startled me!"

"Sorry Sis.Didn't mean to."

"That's all right."She smiled a kind of funny smile and deleted the light."How long have you been home?"

"Just a nano.I just came in."She walked by me and I followed her out into the living room.

"Where've you been all day?I haven't seen you since breakfast."

"I was over at the P.O."

"The P.O.?"She frowned and sat down on the couch."What were you doing there?"

"Nothing, just hanging around I guess.I sat on the couch, kind of on the opposite end from her."Bob around?"

"Nope.Just us."She frowned again."Come on over here, little brother!Do I have a virus or something?"

"Sorry!" I slid over next to her and she squeezed my shoulder."My goodness…When did you get so tall?"

"I dunno.Did I?"

"Seems that way." She sighed.She shook her head and smiled."So – you looking forward to the Academy?It's going to be quite an adventure, huh?"

"Sure."

I think she must have seen something in my face."Don't worry – you'll do just fine.I know it."

"I know…"I looked down at my lap, then away from her, across the room."I guess you're gonna put Mac in my room after I'm gone, huh?"

"What?Who told you that?"

"I… I dunno.I just assumed-"

"Huh!"She pursed her lips at me."Of course we're not going to do that!That's your room, Enzo.Why would you think that?Bob's planning to add-on another room for the baby.An extra bathroom, too.We've all just been too busy to get around to it, that's all."

"Really?"

"Yes, really.You're the silliest boy sometimes, you know that?"

I felt myself blushing."Sorry.I just thought…Sorry."

"Enzo…"She stared at me for a nano."What's wrong with you lately?"

"What do you mean?"

"Enzo, I may not get to spend as much time with you as I used to but I have eyes.You haven't been yourself for minutes!What's wrong?"

"I don't know!"It was true – I didn't.I could feel all the weird feelings I'd had in my processor starting to group together like they were going to try and come out at last.

"Are you worried about the Academy?About all those older kids?You don't have to be scared-"

"I'm not!I'm not, OK?I…I don't know what's wrong with me.I don't feel like I should feel, you know?This whole Academy thing, it's like...It's like it's not really happening at all."

"Not really happening?"She pulled my chin over so I was staring at her."What do you mean, Enzo?"

"I don't know what I mean…"

"Enzo – if you don't want to go you don't have to.You know that, don't you?"

"Yeah."I whispered."I know."

"So – Do you?"

I didn't say anything, just stared at her, searching for what I wanted to say.Looking around inside me for why I was feeling so offline.She finally pulled her hand away from my chin and I looked down at my feet.Finally some words came into my throat, without me really thinking about saying them."I want you guys to…to…"

"To what, Enzo?"

"I don't wanna be…I just want you guys to be a real family, OK?"

I heard a big breath come out of her mouth."What in the net are you talking about?"

"I just think…You've had to worry about me for so long and now you have a kid and a family for real.I don't want you to have to worry about me anymore and I thought you'd want to be able to just worry about them, OK?"

"Enzo!I…Why in the net…"

"I know how much you love Mac, Dot.You had to worry about me all these hours and I'm not even yours, you know...Now you and Bob are together and have a kid and maybe you'll get married and you should be worried about your real family now."

"My _real_ family?"She tried to turn my head but I wouldn't look at her."What in the net do you think _you_ are?"

"Stop it, Dot…"It felt like I was hearing everything like someone else was saying it and not me, but I knew it _was_ me and it was all true.

"Enzo!You look at me this nano.You hear me?Enzo!"I didn't."Enzo, I'm talking to you and I want you to look at me!Don't you owe me that much?"Finally, I gave in, like I pretty much always did when Dot was persistent.

She took my face in her hands and stared me right in the eyes."Enzo…Where in the net did you ever get the idea that you weren't my real family?Where?Did someone tell you that?"

"No!It's just…"

"What?It's just what?"  
  


"I dunno.I just thought…You spend so much time with Mac and everything.He needs you."

"Of course he needs me.He's a baby."

"I _know_ that!But I know how much you… you used to worry about me all the time.And when I asked you about leaving you seemed to think I should go…"

"Enzo, that was your decision!I said I would support you whatever you decided, didn't I?"

"Yeah." I sighed.I wanted to look away from her but I couldn't."You just didn't…When I said I was going you didn't-"

"I didn't what?"

"You didn't seem upset.Or anything…"

"Oh, my User!"She let go of my face and used her hands to cover hers."Delete it!I knew I should've trusted my instincts…"

"What?"

She kept her face hidden in her hands for a long nano."Enzo…Bob and I talked about it.When we decided to talk to you about the Academy, about all of it…We wanted you to feel like you could make your own mind up.Without any guilt or bad feelings to cloud your judgment.We were worried that if I told you what I really felt you'd think you shouldn't go!"

"What you… really felt?"

"Enzo, Enzo."She laughed like she was angry and looked at me again."I didn't want you to worry, that's all.I'm totally unformatted about you leaving!It's deleting me!We just didn't want you to know.Crash it all…"

My processor was totally confused now."You are?"

"Of course I am, you basic boy!How could I not be?"

"I…I thought you'd be happy 'cause it's gonna be just Bob and Mac now…"

"Oh, Enzo."She grabbed my face and kissed me on the forehead."I'm sorry.I'm so, so sorry that I let you think that."

"It's all right…"

"I could see something was wrong.I just thought you were nervous about leaving and the Academy and everything…I should have seen it.I should've been paying more attention to you, I just thought you wanted more space is all.If I'd been spending more time with you I'd have seen it…"

"Dot?"

"Silly boy."She hugged me against her and I just went numb."Silly, silly, little boy.How could you ever think I wouldn't want you around here?How could you ever think that?"

"I don't know." I whispered."I just thought because Mac is your real son and everything…"

"What?Oh, Enzo…"

Now that I'd started to let those thoughts out, it didn't seem like I could stop them."I know it's not the same with me, Dot.I tried to pretend like it was and Mac was my brother, but I know it isn't..."

"Enzo, do you really think I care?Do you think that matters to me?"

"I…I just wish you were my mother."As soon as I said it, I knew I'd always wished it."I wish I'd had a Mom like you, Dot.When it was just you and me I could pretend that's how it was.Even when Bob came to live with us I could pretend but it's not like it is with Mac, I know it isn't…"

"Oh, Enzo."She just sort of held me for a while and I cried a little bit, not too much.Once I'd said what I said I felt like I didn't really have anything else left in me, like I was totally empty.Finally, Dot kissed me on top of the head and whispered to me."Enzo…Do you remember when you were 0.4?"

"What?"I could barely get a word out, my throat was so dry.

"Do you remember when you were 0.4?Maybe an hour or so after Mom and Dad died?"

"I.…I don't know.M-maybe a little.Why-"

"Just hush.You might not remember it – you were pretty young.But I do – every nano.I was pretty scared then, Sweetie – I didn't know much about taking care of you – not like Mom did.But I was doing my best and the more I did it, the more I realized I loved doing it.More than anything."

"Dot-"

"Shhh.I remember one morning, like it was yesterday.I went into your room to wake you up like I always did.Sometimes you came and slept in my bed, but that night you were brave and stayed in your room all night."She laughed softly."I went in to wake you and you looked funny – your little face was all red and you were sweating and when I touched your forehead you were burning up…

"So I tried to wake you up and you didn't at first and that's when I got really scared.I shook you and finally you did wake up, but you looked all wrong, like you weren't really awake.I asked you what was the matter and you just said you felt bad and you started coughing and wheezing.I was terrified, I don't mind telling you."

"I don't remember that…"

"I'm not surprised." Dot smiled."Well, I scooped you right up in my arms – you hardly weighed anything then, you were barely taller than my knee!I ran out through the diner – I'd just bought it a few minutes earlier – and zipped over to the Principal Office as fast as I could.I'm surprised I didn't get us both deleted, I was in such a hurry!But I got us there – I talked to you all the way over, telling you everything would be all right…But I could tell you were scared, too.

"Well, I ran into the P.O. and I was carrying you and yelling for Phong because I didn't even want to put you down long enough to use my organizer to call him, that's how scared I was!I ran and I ran I finally found him in the core control room, and he took one look at us and he knew something was wrong.Well, he led me into an examining room and I set you down on the table and you'd fallen asleep again, poor little thing.He did all sorts of tests and you know what?"

"What?"I was into the story now, in spite of myself.

"You had the Melissa virus – a bad case, too.They have a vaccine for kids now but in those days it was a real problem.Do you remember now?"

"I remember you telling me I had Melissa.I haven't thought about it for a long time…"

Dot smiled."I think about it a lot.Phong wanted to keep you in the P.O. but I asked him if I could take you home and take care of you there.It was really important to me, I'm not sure why.He was a little reluctant but he gave me some anti-virals and an instruction program and I took you home and put you in my bed and then I had the longest three cycles of my life."

"Really?"Faint memories were starting to fire in my processor.

"Oh, yeah." Dot sighed."I was so scared, all the time I was scared.I was worried that it was my fault – I thought maybe I'd let you down somehow, even though I knew that wasn't true.I wiped your face off with cold towels, and I made you tea and soup and I read to you – even comic books!I talked to you and I sang to you and when you slept I held you so you wouldn't wake up scared…I held you when you were coughing a lot so you wouldn't break a rib, that's how bad your cough was…

"And all the time I was thinking.Thinking about how incredibly precious you are – how much I love you, how much I need you.How I didn't even want to keep processing if you didn't get better, because you were the one thing that gave me joy, every cycle."She was quiet for a nano and I just stared at her.I think we were both remembering, even though I think she remembered it a lot more clearly than I did.

"Well…I kept giving you the anti-virals and Phong came to check on you twice a cycle, and on the third night your fever broke, and your breathing started to clear up and even though you were still sick, I knew you were OK.I knew you were going to get better.The next time Phong came over I was so happy I laughed and kissed him – you should have seen his face!I think that was the happiest I ever felt, knowing you weren't going to leave me…"

"Oh, User."The more she talked, the more it came back to me.I remembered it all, like it'd been in there all along, just hiding."I remember!I remember it…"

Dot kissed my forehead again."You know how I told you I was thinking, all the time you were sick?I was thinking all those things, how I loved you and needed you and I'd give anything for you to get better.You know the one thing I never thinking?'Enzo isn't my son.'That thought never entered my processor for a fraction of a nano.You were my little boy and I loved you – that was all that mattered.It's still all that matters."

"Dot…"I put my head on her shoulder.I wanted to believe it was that simple.But I knew things were different now.

"You're my little boy and I love you.Nothing else matters.You'll always be my little boy, no matter how big you get."

"But I'm not your son!You're not… How can you love me like you love Mac, Dot?"

"Oh Enzo…You can never love two people the exact same way – that's just how sprites are.Every time you love someone it's unique – I love you, I love Mac, and Bob, Matrix…I love all of you in different ways.Even if I had another baby it'd be totally different than you or Mac.It doesn't mean I'd love either of you any less!"

"You…You wouldn't?"

"Of course not." She whispered."Sweetie, what you and I have – no one else could ever understand it.Everything we've been through together, losing Mom and Dad… You growing up with no other little sprites around… You were everything to me.Getting through that together was a gift – it gave us something no one else could ever have and we'll always have it.There's a special spot in my heart – right in the middle.That's your place.No one else will ever share that place – it's yours and it always will be.I could never love anyone else the way I love you."

"Dot…"I looked up at her and I have to say, I still had doubts in my processor and I still have them.There's a part of me that always will, that feels like an orphan in spite of everything.But it was impossible to look at her eyes and not believe her – I could see she'd meant everything she said and that was enough.I guess it'll always have to be enough.I just wrapped myself around her neck as tight as I could."Dot, I need you so much…"

"I know, Angel.I know you do.Everything's gonna be fine, don't worry."

"Dot, I love you…"

"It's OK, Enzo.I love you too.It's OK."

It was hard for me to understand how I'd never admitted all those things, never even knew I'd been thinking them.It was all so obvious now, I just couldn't grasp how I could've avoided them for so long."Dot…I'm sorry I said that stuff.I'm sorry."

She kissed my forehead, over and over."I'm sorry I let you feel like you did for so long, Sweetie.I should've talked to you sooner.I just thought you were getting older, you wanted me to-I don't know…"

"It's OK."I was still holding onto her, like I was afraid to let go.

"No it's not.But there's nothing we can do about it now.Just never think I don't want you, OK?Don't you _ever_ think that again."

"I won't."Even then, as much as I loved Dot at that nano, I couldn't be sure I was telling the truth.But being right where I was made me at least think it was possible.That's how Dot's hugs are.

"Promise?"

"Promise."

"Enzo…"She grabbed a tissue from the box next to the couch and wiped my eyes."You really are getting to be a young man now, you know.It hasn't been easy for me to step back – I've been taking care of you for so long.But we all grow up, I suppose."

"I guess."

"My Enzo…"She smiled."I've got too much deleted worry invested in you to stop now, Kiddo!I'm never going to back off too far.You're still my boy, you hear me?"

"I know." I smiled back."I don't want you to stop."

"OK, then."She tousled my hair and sighed."So you know you can stay here, don't you?If you were going to the Academy because you thought I didn't want to worry about you anymore, you don't have to.This place will always be your home."

"I know."The Academy had totally dropped out of my mind until she mentioned it again – it just didn't seem important.It kind of shocked me for a nano to think about it.But then a weird thing happened – even though Dot said she didn't want me to leave and even though I knew she was telling the truth, I still wanted to go.Even more than I did before, actually."I…I still want to go."

"Really?You know you don't-"

"No.I know."It was like for the first time I actually felt _right_ about going.All of the being excited and curious and scared that hadn't been where they should have been in my mind… They were there now.Like I didn't have to worry about the other stuff and now I could worry about what I should have been all along.I smiled at her."I still think it's the right thing to do.I want to be a Guardian, and I want to meet all those other sprites and see another system.Can I still go?"

"Of course you can!" Dot chuckled and kissed me again."As long as you know that when you come home I'll be waiting for you.All of us will.This is where you belong – right here."

"I know."The bad thing was, now that I'd said all that stuff to Dot it'd cleared out my processor, which meant that I could start to think about all kinds of other stuff.I liked thinking about traveling and the game training and the other kids, but I was also thinking about how those other kids would treat me and whether I was gonna be good enough for the Academy.And I was thinking about something even scarier, too."User Dot, I'm gonna miss you so much..."

"I'll miss you too, Honey.But it won't be that long.Two hours is all.It'll feel like forever sometimes, but we'll get through it."

"Two hours!"It did feel like forever, like my whole life.

Dot hugged me again, really hard."We'll see you on your school holidays when you come home.Semester breaks, vacations…Bob and I can come visit you sometimes, too.I know he'll want to see his dad.We'll see lots of each other, don't worry."

"I guess."It was too much time to think about all at once.It was too much everything – I bet I'd thought about more stuff that cycle than I'd ever thought in my whole life.I couldn't handle any more right then.I just wanted to stay in Dot's arms forever and never have to worry about anything else. 


	3. Close to the Tree

CHAPTER III 

**CLOSE TO THE TREE**

After that cycle it was like I became a totally different person.  Part of me was the old Enzo again, the kid I was before.  Sometimes I liked being him and sometimes I didn't, but he was a big part of me again and I guess he always will be.  But now I was also a totally new person, and that was because of the Academy.  It was all real to me now – all the excitement and the fear and the worry and everything else…  All the stuff I hadn't been letting myself feel because there was something much more important taking up my RAM.

For the first time I really understood just how big this was.  I'd never, ever left Mainframe for even a cycle – and now I was going away for two hours.  _Two hours_!  That felt like forever.  Even though I knew I'd be coming home once in a while it was still pretty intimidating.

It's weird – I actually felt worse in a way, because after Dot and I had our talk I really appreciated what I was leaving.  Being in Mainframe seemed like a lot better proposition than it had a few cycles before.  But it was OK, 'cause the more I thought about it the more I realized that even though it was gonna be hard to be away, as long as I knew I was coming home I could get through it.

There was another reason I wasn't too panicky about the whole thing, too.  Even though I knew I'd been a pretty basic little kid when I started going into games with Bob, he never told me I was.  While we were in games Bob always treated me like I belonged there, even when I was pretty sure I didn't.  It took a while but I actually started to believe I _did_ belong there – I started to believe I was good.  And Bob pushed me along, little by little.  He worked me a little harder and let me do more stuff on my own and before I knew it, I felt like a real cadet.

That was why, even though I was leaving in a few cycles and I was nervous, I wasn't totally scared of crashing out.  It was like a gift Bob gave me - I knew how smart he was and how good he was, and if he believed I could do it who was I to argue?   He gave me a lot of knowledge of strategy and how to outsmart Users and figure out games and all that stuff, too – but I could've learned that at the Academy.  The other thing I could only get from him.

Those last few cycles I spent in Mainframe seemed to go by so fast.  They were like a dream, in a way – I wanted to stop and really appreciate every nano but I'd get distracted and then when I got back to appreciating them another millisecond was gone, another second, then another cycle.

I could tell Dot was thinking a lot of the same thoughts and feeling a lot of the same feelings I was, even though we didn't talk about it.  I found myself just staring at her sometimes, and sometimes I'd see her staring at _me_ without saying anything.  Then when I'd look over she'd just sort of smile and still not say anything.

A couple of nights before I was supposed to leave I was brushing my teeth in the bathroom and Dot came in.  I could see her grinning at me in the mirror and I kind of grinned back around the toothbrush.  Neither of us said anything, so I finished brushing my teeth and spit out the toothpaste and the water and I looked at her face in the mirror.  "What're you thinking about?"

"Nothing much."  She put her arms around my neck from behind, and I was just tall enough that if I stood on my tiptoes the top of my head fit right under her chin.  "Just about how grown up you are, all of a sudden."

"I am?"

"Sure you are." She giggled.  "I never got to watch you grow up the first time you did it, you know."

"That wasn't me.  _I_ didn't grow up – Matrix did."

"I know, silly."   She stared at the mirror me for a nano.  "But I still never got to see it.  That's why every time I look at you and notice how big you've gotten, or how mature you act, it amazes me.   You're turning into a new person every cycle, seems like."

"Maybe."  Of course she'd said what I'd been thinking about a lot.  Dot was like that.

"And now I'm going to miss some of those changes." She sighed.  "It makes me sad to think about that…"

"Don't be sad."  I wasn't sure I could handle Dot being sad right then.  She had to be able to help _me_ get through it, didn't she?  "You said we'd see each other plenty, didn't you?"

"Sure we will.  Anything less than all the time would never be enough for me, I guess."  She kissed me on top of the head.  "Look at you!  _This_ is what you wear to bed, now?"

"What about it?"  I was wearing shorts and a t-shirt.  To be honest I'd wanted to wear them to bed ever since I found out that's what Bob did, but Dot never let me.  She'd been so busy with Mac that I'd just changed my wardrobe program a while before and never told her.

"So – you're too old to wear pajamas now?"

"No…  I just-"

"Silly boy!" she laughed.  "Well, that's all right.  You're old enough to decide what kind of clothes you want to wear, I suppose.  But I think they might have something to say about your wardrobe program at the Academy, though.  Standard issue only, I bet."

"That's what Bob said."

"Hmmm."  She kissed me again.  "User – look at this hair!"

"What about it?"  I'd just taken a shower a few micros before, and sometimes I forget to do anything with my hair when I get out of the shower and it kind of sticks out all over the place when it gets dry.

"It's a mess!" Dot laughed.  

"I guess I forgot to comb it…"

"I guess you did!"  She shook her head and picked my hairbrush up off the counter.  "There's going to be girls at the Academy you know.  Don't you want to look nice for them?"

"Girls?"  I knew there's be girls at the Academy – I'm not basic! – but until that nano I'd kind of pushed it out of my processor.  Girls!  _They'd_ care about what I looked like, wouldn't they?

"Yes – girls!  Maybe you've heard of them."  She started to slowly brush my hair down onto my head.  "Aren't you excited about that?"

"It's no big deal." I lied.  "I'm going to learn about the games, that's all."

Dot's face in the mirror kind of bit its lower lip for a nano.  She giggled and kept brushing my hair, trying to get the tangles out.  "Those girls aren't going to have a chance when they see you, little brother.  They'll go offline over you."

"Dot, stop it!"  No one could make me blush like Dot.  I could see it in the mirror.

"I mean it, Enzo.  You've become such a handsome young man.  You're brave, you're funny – what's not to like?"

"Ow!"

"Sorry."  She gently extricated the brush and kissed me on the head.  "I think you've learned a little something from Bob besides games, too.  You've picked up a little of that swagger of his…"

"Dot?"

"Enzo…  Promise me you'll take care of yourself, all right?  Keep your hair neat and brush your teeth after every meal and change your underwear every cycle and-"

"Dot!"

"I mean it, Enzo.  I'm not going to be there to nag you and make sure you do all those things!  I want to know you'll be all right."

I finally turned around.  "I've been mostly doing them on my own since Mac came, Dot.  You just haven't had the time… And I've been doing OK, haven't I?"

"Sure." She sighed and patted my cheek.  "You know how I worry, that's all."

"I know."  It was kinda nice, knowing that she still worried about stuff like that.  "I'll do all that, Dot.  I promise.  You don't have to worry about that stuff."

"OK.  I'll try!"  She reached over and squeezed my nose.  "But I can't make any promises!  Now go to bed – you need your downtime.  You may be a teenager but in this house you still do what I say, got it?"

"Got it." I giggled.  She stared at me for a nano, smiled and turned away.

The next morning I got up and played with the baby for a few nanos before breakfast.  He always seemed to have a lot of energy at that time of day for some reason, and seeing him all hyper and giggling always made me less tired, too.  Which was good, 'cause I usually don't do too well in the mornings.

Dot was in the kitchen getting breakfast ready and I heard Bob whistling, so I wandered over to the bathroom where he was getting ready to shave.  I hung around, for no special reason.  Just wanting to be around him, I guess.  I guess I didn't want to spend any of the next two cycles by myself.

Bob smiled and winked at me when he saw me standing in the doorway.  "Morning, Tiger.  What're you up to?"

"Not much.  I was playing with Mac and now I'm waiting for breakfast.  What about you?"

"Gonna shave, genius.  Looks like we're not sending you to school a nano too soon!"

"Very funny!"  He laughed and flicked a little dab of shaving cream at my face.  "Hey!"

"Poor baby…"  He grinned and turned back to the mirror.

"Will…  Will you show me how to do that?"

  
"Do what?"

"You know…  Shave."  I hadn't planned on asking him but it just sort of came out.

Bob looked a little surprised.  "Do you really think you need to shave yet, Tiger?"

I felt kind of silly.  "No, I guess not.  It's kinda dumb, isn't it?"

"Nah."  He smiled and waved me over.  "Can't learn too soon, that's what I say.  You'll be at the Academy for quite a while – better I teach you now, just in case."

"Really?  Cool!  I guess I don't…  I don't think I really want to have a beard or anything.  You know – when I'm older."

He nodded.  "Your call on that, Pal.  You ready?"

"Sure."

"OK, then.  Hold out your hand."  I did, and he sprayed a little ball of shaving cream onto it.  "Get a little of that between your fingers and spread it on your face.  You don't want too much – just a thin layer.  Don't forget that little spot under your nose – unless you want a moustache, that is?"

"No!" I giggled.

"No?"  Bob winked and spread some shaving cream on his chin.  "You'd think after saving the city and half the net I'd figure out a way not to have to do this every cycle…  OK – got that shaving cream on there?  Spread nice and thin?"

"Uh-huh."   I couldn't get over how weird I looked in the mirror.

"Good boy."  He opened the cabinet and rooted around for a nano, then came out with a razor.  "Here you go."

"Thanks."  I kind of stared at the razor for a nano, not really sure what to do with it.

"The key to shaving is to take it nice and slow, Enzo.  I always feel like I'm in a hurry and I hate shaving anyway, but when I try to do it too fast I always end up cutting myself and that's no fun at all.  Got that?"

"Right, nice and slow.  Got it."

"Good." he chuckled.  "There's no blade in there, so don't worry.  You're just learning the motions this time.  Now watch me.  On the cheeks and under the nose, nice slow downward strokes, right?  And when you do your chin, go the opposite direction.  Against the grain.  OK?"

"OK Bob, got it."

"Cool.  Here we go.  Just watch me and do what I do, OK?"

"OK!"

"OK!"  Bob grinned at me and slowly started drawing the razor down his cheek.  I watched him and tried to follow along as close as I could.  It felt weird, kind of ticklish.  But it was fun, too.

Every once in a while Bob would glance over to see how I was doing.  After we'd both shaved for a few nanos he nodded and smiled.  "So – how you feeling about the Academy, Kiddo – you ready?"

"Yeah.  I mean - I guess so.  I'm trying to remember everything you taught me."

"That shouldn't be too hard." He winked.  "Don't over think stuff, Enzo.  All those things I taught you are important, but you need to follow your instincts.  You're a Guardian – you have to trust your feelings in a game sometimes, because they'll be all you have.  Understand?"

"I think so."  I nodded.  "That's 'cause of the Guardian codes, right?"

"Missed a spot, there – right under your nose."

"Oops – sorry!"

"No problem!  That's the toughest part of the face to get to.  The Guardian codes are a part of it, Enzo.  A big part.  But they're nothing without _your_ codes.  You're the Guardian – the protocols just enhance what's already there.  Every Guardian is different."

"I think I understand..."

"Don't worry – you'll do just fine.  Let's see your face, Hotshot."

"Did I do it all right?"

"Not bad, not bad.  Got some shaving cream on your ear, there – probably flicked it there with the razor.  Gotta watch out for that.  Pretty easy to cut your ear if you've got a blade in the razor."

"Really?"

He winked and tousled my hair.  "All right, let's go ahead and do the chin now.  That's where your beard is really thick so you have to be careful.  Oh!  I almost forgot the most important thing."

"What?"

"_Never_ let your girlfriend use your razor."

"What?"  I couldn't help but laugh.

"I mean it, Tiger.  Hide it somewhere, do what you have to do.  If you don't they'll use it to shave their legs and you'll look like Glitch took a rotor to your face.  Do they care?  No.  Hey!  What's so funny?"

"Nothing!  I don't think I'm gonna have to worry about that for a while, anyways."

"Well…  Don't say I didn't warn you."  He turned his attention back to the mirror and lifted his razor, so I did the same.  "There's a few things I want to tell you before you go, Enzo.  Stuff I think you should know.  So just listen up, OK?"

"Sure…  What kind of stuff?"

He glanced down at me.  "You know you're going to be the youngest cadet at the Academy, right?"

"Yeah."  That thought was never too far from my processor.

"Well – don't let anyone push you around.  There'll be some cadets that try to – I guarantee it.  Most of the people you meet will be really nice, but there's always a few bullies.  That's they way places like the Academy are – sometimes the smaller kids have to fight for respect."

"That's all right." I said softly.  "I'm used to be being the smallest, Bob."

"I know you are, Tiger.  And I'm not telling you to get into fights – that doesn't solve anything and you'll just get into trouble.  But you have to know who you are the nano you walk through that door – you're Enzo Matrix.  You're Dot Matrix' brother and you're the best that Mainframe has to offer.  You're my student.  _My_ boy.  You belong there – never forget that, Enzo.  And let everybody know it from second one.  Show them that you don't care how big they are, or where they come from.  Show them that you can't be intimidated and they'll leave you alone.  You understand?"

"I understand."  I couldn't help but be a little scared – How could I be sure I could actually hold up when all this stuff started happening?  I'd never even been to school with other little sprites before!  But I knew I had to do it or Bob would be disappointed.

I think he must have seen in my face that I was kinda worried.  He smiled and punched my shoulder.  "Don't sweat it.   You're gonna have a great time – you won't believe how much fun the Academy is once you get settled.  You'll have to adjust at first – everybody does.  But I'll only be a portal away.  And I have absolutely no doubt about it – you'll kick ASCII."

"Really?"

"Big time!"  I grinned and went to give him a quick hug.  "Hey! You're getting shaving cream on my uniform!"

I pulled away quickly. "Sorry!"

"No prob."  He chuckled and pulled me back.  "Don't sweat it, Kiddo.  This is what we've been working for these last three hours.  It's gonna be alphanumeric."

"OK." I smiled.  "Thanks."

"OK."  We finished our hug and went back to shaving, although my processor wasn't in it anymore.  "Couple more things.  About my Dad."

I looked up.  "Yeah?"

"He can be pretty tough.  And he won't go easy on you 'cause we're family.  But he's always fair, Enzo.  He wants you to be the best Guardian you can be.  Sometimes he doesn't realize that people can't do things exactly the right way – _his_ way - every time.  He expects a lot and he can be a real null when he doesn't get it.  But he doesn't do it to be mean – he does it because he thinks you've got what it takes to be great.  That's all.  OK?"

"Sure."  I remembered Laser pretty well from his visit.  He'd actually been kinda nice to me, but I could see what Bob was talking about, too.

Bob smiled.  "Just don't let him get to you.  And don't expect him to show you he cares about you – that doesn't come easy for him.  But he does, Enzo – I can promise you he does."

"I know."  It wasn't easy for Bob to talk about Laser.  I knew he wasn't the dad Bob wanted when he was a kid.  But they were better now – almost like they were friends or something.  And I knew that made Bob proud.

"OK then.  We about done, here?  You get that beard all shaved off?"

"Yeah." I giggled.  "I guess so."

"Good boy.  Now, just take a little of this after-shave stuff and pour it onto your hands.  Not too much…  And sort of pat it onto your face.  Helps keep you from cutting yourself the next time.  That's what they say, anyway – I have no idea if it works."

"Smells funny…"

"Yeah!  I guess…"

"Feels funny too."

"It's good for your face." He chuckled.  He dabbed his face off with a towel and passed it to me, and I did the same.  He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and we walked out into the hall and he sort of steered me towards his and Dot's bedroom.  "Just a couple more things I want to cover, Enzo."

"In here?"

He looked around.  Mac's crib was empty – he was in the kitchen with Dot.  He shut the door and we sat on the bed.  "Yeah.  I kinda wanted it to be just you and me for this part."

"What part?"  I was a little puzzled by this point.

"I just wanted to talk to you about some…  Some stuff…"

"What kind of stuff?"  Bob kind of looked down and shuffled his feet.  "Bob?"

He was obviously uncomfortable.  "You know.  Just a nice talk.  Man to man."

"Bob?"

He grinned sheepishly and started to blush.  I don't think I'd seen him blush since I told him I knew Dot was gonna have a baby.  "Enzo…  I know I haven't been around for your whole life and everything.  But I feel like…  You know.  Like I've been helping look after you a lot and all that.  You know what I'm trying to say?"

He was really starting to give me the jaggies.  I'd never seen him so nervous before.  "You…  Not exactly, I guess-"

"Just…  We're a pretty good team, right?  I mean – you and me are as much a family as anybody else, aren't we?"

"Yeah!" I nodded.  "Of course we are!"

He smiled.  "Good.  Good…  It's just…  I think I should be the one to tell you about stuff.  You know – the bauds and the binomes and all…"

I felt like I could almost have fallen off the bed.  I don't know which one of us was blushing more, but I think Mouse's hair would've blended right into either of our faces.  "Jeez!  Bob…"

"Well…  I think it's important, Enzo.  You're going away from home and you'll be gone a long time.  You're not a little kid anymore.  There's some stuff you need to know."

"No – I don't!  Just end file, OK?"

I know he was tempted.  He looked as uncomfortable as I felt.  "No, Tiger.  Look, there's no reason to be embarrassed-"

"Puh-leeeze!"

"No!"  He finally looked up at me.  "Just…  Just let me get this out, OK?  My dad never had this talk with me before I left home and I can tell you, he would've saved me a lot of worry and confusion if he had.  I don't want you to have to deal with all that stuff like I did.   Just let me tell you what I think I need to tell you, and it'll all be over before we know it and we'll be out there eating French toast.  OK?"

"Bob-"

"OK?"

I sighed and closed my eyes.  "All right…"

"All right."  I heard him take a deep breath.  "Stop me if you have any questions, K?"

I nodded.  "K."

I heard another deep breath, and felt him ruffle my hair.  We talked for a while, and to be honest it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be.  I was totally embarrassed through the whole thing, I admit.  I wished I was anywhere but there.  Hex's lair would've sounded pretty good, if you'd offered.  But we got through it, and I actually learned some stuff I never knew.  And there was a lot of stuff I'd been too embarrassed to ask about that Bob answered without me even having to ask, which was awesome.  I guess it was like getting an antiviral shot – it's really bad when it's happening but afterwards, you're glad you did.  And when we were done we hugged again and went out into the kitchen and ate French toast.

Another thing I had to do before I left was have a talk with Frisket.

I know that sounds kinda silly.  I mean, Frisket is a dog and everything and I know he doesn't really talk – but I think he understands almost everything I tell him.  And I know he'd spent all that time with Matrix after he was all grown up so it wasn't anything new for him not to have the little kid me around.  But for me it was a big deal – I'd never spent a cycle away from Frisket since the nano Dot brought him home.  And I didn't want him to think I was just gonna forget about him.

The first thing I did was take him to Floating Point Park, 'cause he's always loved it there.  There's all kinds of room to run around and stuff to chase and weird smells and he can get all muddy by the data stream.  It's a pretty cool place.

After we'd run around the park for a while I was kinda tired, so I flopped down under a tree and just laid back and looked up at the sky.  Frisket sniffed around for a while until he got bored and then he sat down next to me and out his chin on his paws.  So I talked to him for a while and told him how much I'd miss him, and how Matrix would do a good job taking care of him like he did while I was gone, and how I'd be back a few times an hour and for the semester breaks and how the whole thing would only take a couple of hours and then I'd be home for real. 

A couple of hours seemed like a long time to me, but I knew it was a lot longer for a dog.  It was easy to forget all those hours he spent in the games, in game time – Frisket was a very old dog.  Even regular time is like game time for them!  I didn't like to think about that – it scared me a lot.  But I also knew Frisket wasn't like other dogs – even though he was old he didn't _seem_ old – he still ran around and was as strong as Matrix when he wanted to be.  And he seemed to know stuff a dog shouldn't know.  I don't think anybody really knew just what Frisket was except Old Man Pearson – and he wasn't telling.  He's a secretive old guy – they even told me that while I was away they'd found out he was a codemaster.  Mister Pearson – a codemaster!  Is that basic or what?

After Old Man Pearson popped into my processor I decided to take Frisket over there, 'cause the data dump is another one of Frisket's favorite places.  I like it too, to be honest – I kinda wanted to see it before I left.  The data dump always brought good memories into my processor – air carts and cool junk and Frisket.  What's not to like?

When we got to the yard I didn't announce myself or anything – just habit I guess.  I didn't see Mister Pearson around anywhere so I slid the gate open and slipped inside, Frisket right behind me.  As soon as we got inside Frisket started sniffing around like crazy and poking his face right into the piles of garbage.  He was home.

I was just gonna sit there and watch him and not do anything, but I noticed an old zip drive in a big pile of junk so I went over and picked it up.  It was pretty cool – I hadn't seen one since I was a little kid.  There was other cool stuff in there, too – copy commands and cd-rom caddies and Thinkpads.  Thinkpads!  Before I knew it I was digging into the piles of junk and rooting around, just like Frisket.

I was elbow deep inside and old I-Mac when I heard a familiar voice.  "Hey!  Who's that rattlin' around in me yard?"  

I couldn't help it – as soon as I heard him I jumped back from the stack of junk and fell on my bitmap.  It wasn't 'cause he was a codemaster or anything – it was just that he was Mister Pearson.  At the very least I was gonna get yelled at, and if he was in a real bad mood he'd get me in trouble with Dot.  Then I remembered I was leaving in a cycle, and I wasn't 0.1 anymore.  "It's me, Mister Pearson."

He appeared around the corner and Frisket started barking loudly.  "Eh?  Who is that, The Matrix lad?   Flyin' toasters!  Look what ye done to my yard!"

"I'm sorry!  I'll clean it up-"

"Always were a troublemaker, Boy!  Ye'll clean it up allright, and sure ye will!  What're ye doin', tearing up me good scrap?"

I looked around.  "I…  I don't know.  I was just looking at stuff…"

"Just looking at stuff, were ye?  Just throwing stuff to the four winds looks like, Lad!"

"Sorry."  I went down on my knees and started gathering the junk up, trying to remember where I'd found it.  Just like that I was a little boy again.

"You'll never change, Boy." The old man scowled.  "I think I'm rid of ye and there ye are, another one of ye back again to torment this tired old binome.  Crikey…"

"I _said_ I was sorry!"

"Never could see this fascination with me scrap, Lad."  He shook his head and laughed.  "So – Word is yer on to be leavin' Mainframe, then?  That right?"  

"Yes, Sir.  I'm going to the Guardian Academy tomorrow."

"The Guardian Academy, is it?  Is that old place up and online again?  I never thought I'd see the day…"

"Yes, Sir."

Mister Pearson looked me up and down appraisingly.  "Well – yer still on to bein' a bit of a scrawny lad, aren't ye?  Still – older that that other one.  The first boy.  He was even scrawnier than ye when he went off to the games, he was.  Never thought I'd be seein' him processin' again."

"I guess.  He was 1.1, I think.  I just turned 1.3."

"Did ye?  Did ye now, Lad.  Did ye…"  He walked over and absently scratched Frisket behind the ears.  There weren't many sprites Frisket would let get away with that, but he never gave Old Man Pearson any trouble.  "Ye on to leavin' the dog here then, are ye?"

"Yeah.  Matrix is gonna look after him till I get back.  I guess he's really his dog anyway, so…"

"Pah!  Dog should be with his boy, he should.  That's his job then, ain't it?  How long ye about bein' gone, Lad?"

"Two hours.  That's what Bob says."

"Two hours!  Is that all?  I'll barely have time to sort out the mess around here!"

"I'll get it cleaned up-"

"Eh!  Leave it Lad, just leave it." the old man sighed.  "Get on home before that sister o' yer's misses ye.  A real plum of a girl she is, that one…"

"Really?"

"Yeh, I'll clean in up, be off with ye!  And be sure to do yer work and don't be slackin' yer little bitmap at that Academy!  Yer sister'll be countin' on ye to do her proud, Boy.  A real plum of a girl she is, that one."

I stood up and wiped my hands on my pants.  I could never quite figure out Old Man Pearson – he was a strange old binome.  "Thanks, Mister Pearson.  Sorry about the mess."

"Not as sorry as ye will be if ye ever do it again, Boy!  Now clear off and take this old fleabag with ye, hear me?  And next time I won't be so kind and gentle with ye.  Go!"

"OK, OK!"  I tossed my surfboard out in front of me and took off.  Frisket barked at Old Man Pearson and took off after me.  I thought about the old man all the way home – what a weird old binome he was.  I couldn't even imagine living alone, all by myself for all that time.  Who knows how old he is!  He could be older than Phong.  And all he ever did was chase people off.  What a weird guy.

When I got back to the diner Dot was sitting on the couch giving Mac his bottle.  She took one look at me and her mouth dropped open.  "Enzo!  What in the world…"

"What?"  My mind was still on Mister Pearson.

She set the baby down and stood up.  "Look at you!  Where in the world have you been?"

"Oh! I... I was over at the data dump I guess."

"You're filthy!"

I looked down.  I had dirt and grease all over my hands, on my pants…  Even on my shirt.   I felt my stomach lurch like it had so many times since I was a little kid.  "I'm sorry…"

"Looks like you were _in_ the data dump to me!  Look at that uniform!  Oh, Enzo…"

I took a couple steps towards her.  "I didn't mean to!  I-"

"Enzo!  Your boots!  You're getting grease all over the floor…"

"Oops!  Sorry.  I was just helping Mister Pearson clean up and I guess I…  I got a little messy.  Sorry!"

"Oh, Enzo."  She sighed and buried her face in her hands for a nano.  I felt like I was about 0.2.  "And just why did Mister Pearson need help to clean up?"

I looked down at my feet.  "Me and Frisket were digging around and I guess we…"

"Just take your boots off.  Don't take another step."

"Yes, Ma'am."

She started laughing, real softly at first but then louder.  I heard Mac giggling, like he was imitating her.  "What's so funny?"

Dot walked over to me, shaking her head.  "Look at this – it's even on your face!  Just go into the bathroom right now and get cleaned up, all right?  

"OK, Sis.  Sorry.  What's so funny?"

She smiled and started to hug me, then her eyes kind of looked down at my uniform and she sighed and pulled back.  "Nothing.  You're really a stinker, you know that?  Go ahead and get cleaned up."  She looked around my face for a nano, then gingerly kissed me on the nose.  "Go."  She gave me a little push on my way.

"OK."  I looked back at her, wondering what she was thinking about.  She just smiled and picked up my boots and waved me away, and I went into the bathroom and took a shower.

I didn't sleep very well that night.  All I could think about was that it was the last night I'd be spending in my docking bay for a long time.  I know it doesn't sound so bad, but I'd never spent a night away from my bed – not since we'd moved into the diner after my folks deleted.  The only nights I hadn't slept in my docking bay were the ones when I was a little kid and I'd begged Dot to let me stay in her room.

Dot asked me if I wanted everybody to come out and see me off when I left.  I thought about it for a while, but I decided I couldn't handle it – if everyone was there, staring at me, I'd just think too much about them and how much I'd miss them and miss Mainframe and I just wouldn't be able to handle it. So I said just her would be better.  At least that way if I lost it she and Bob would be the only ones to see.

We were gonna leave in the middle of the cycle, right after lunch.  Bob was coming with me – he _had_ to come with me, I guess, or I'd have no other way to get there.  Bob never explained exactly how, but somehow because he had Glitch's codes he could open up a portal and travel through the net, and he could take other sprites with him, too.  He tried to tell me how it worked but I didn't really get it.  Maybe Mouse or Phong would've understood – I'm not sure anybody else would have.

That was a really exciting idea – traveling through the net with Bob when I'd never left Mainframe, even.  Bob was gonna stay at the Academy for a couple cycles, too – they said it was so he could see his Dad and Mouse and Ray, but I knew it was really so he'd be with me and make sure I didn't get too scared or lonely at first.  I guess it should've bothered me, but it didn't – I was just glad he was gonna be there.   Those first few cycles seemed like they were gonna last an hour.

So that left me one last morning in Mainframe, to do whatever I wanted.  I'd already kinda said my good-byes to Phong at the P.O. but there were two people I wanted to see before I left.  Like I said, I figured I'd have a better chance of keeping it together if I saw them one at a time instead of everybody all together.  So the first person I went to see was AndrAIa.

When Dot first told me how AndrAIa came to Mainframe, I thought she was kidding – telling me a bedtime story like when I was a kid.  Who ever heard of a game sprite leaving a game?  It was impossible!  But I finally worked up the nerve to ask AndrAIa about it and she told me it was true.  And one thing I learned pretty quick about AndrAIa was she never lied about anything – never.  It was almost like she didn't know _how_ to lie.

It sounds silly, but I was kinda scared of AndrAIa at first.  Well, not _scared_ exactly, but definitely really, really nervous.  Every time she came near we I'd get all fidgety and sweaty and I couldn't even talk right.  I didn't know why for a long time – it sure wasn't anything she said or did.  She was really nice to me and smiled and laughed and she actually seemed interested in what I was doing, which the other grown-ups didn't a lot of the time.  So I wasn't really sure why I got so off-line around her.  Then when I got a little older I figured it out – it's because she's perfect.

No, I mean it – she is!  She's the most beautiful sprite in the net, and I don't even have to see the rest of the net to know, it's so obvious.  She's smart – she knows almost as much about games as Bob, and almost as much about geeky stuff as Mouse.  She's funny.  She's really nice – she never made fun of me or yelled at me, ever. She's fun, too – she still likes to run around and laugh and have fun, like a kid.  And did I mention she's perfect?

After a while I got so I could hang around Andri and not act like a total null – not more than usual, anyway.  We played jetball and went circuit racing and raced our jetboards and sat and drank energy shakes and talked, and every nano was incredible.  Every time I was with AndrAIa I never wanted it to end, but it always did and she always went home with Matrix and I really hated him sometimes because of it.  But he's been through a lot so I figure it all evens out, sooner or later.

I went to see AndrAIa at their apartment, Bob's old place.  She was in the garage, working on Bob's car, which had crapped out yet again.  He always tried to fix it himself and made it worse, then he asked her to fix what he'd done and then whatever had been the original problem in the first place.  And she always did.  Only half of her was visible; the other half was under the car, banging on something.  "Hey!" I shouted.

She kept banging, so I shouted again, louder.  Finally she stopped and shimmied out from under the car.  When she saw me she smiled and wiped her face on her sleeve.  "Hey!  Why aren't you getting ready to leave?"

"I'm all packed and everything."  I smiled, but seeing her face and knowing I wasn't gonna see it tomorrow made me feel like deleting myself. 

She grabbed a soda out of the six-pack in the front seat and tossed it to me, then grabbed one for herself and sat on the trunk.  I caught my soda and sat next to her.  "Thanks."

"No prob.  So – you excited?"

"Yeah.  It's gonna be pretty cool."

"Yeah.  If things had worked out differently maybe I'd have gone, you know?  Matrix would have.  I'm pretty sure I would've tried to go with him."

"I bet you would!"

"Yeah."  Andri laughed and took a swig of soda.  She winked at me.  "User, I'm gonna miss you, Kid.  Who am I gonna beat at jetball now?  Matrix is no fun – he sulks when he loses."

"Yeah!  Sorry."  I just wanted to look at her more than anything else – I didn't have much to say.  I usually don't around AndrAIa.  Is it possible I'll ever meet anyone else like her?  Sure doesn't seem likely.

"Well…  That's OK."  She ruffled my hair.  "I think I can get by for a few minutes until semester break.  Just make sure you keep in practice – and I expect to see some new strategies the next time we play.  Learn a lot, OK?"

"Yeah."

She grinned.  "Quiet today, aren't you?"

"Sorry.  I guess I don't…  I don't know what I want to say."

"Well, don't worry about it."  Andri wrapped her arm around me and giggled.  "And don't worry about anything else, either.  You're gonna do great, and you'll be home before you know it.  And when you come back we'll pick up like we never left off.  OK?"

"OK." I whispered.  I definitely did _not_ want to lose it in front of her, and I could feel myself slipping dangerously close.  Before I could stop myself I kissed her on the cheek real quick, jumped down to the floor and started for the stairs.  "Bye, Andri.  See you soon, OK?"  It didn't come out very loud.

"You all right, Sparky?"

"Yeah, I'm fine.  Matrix upstairs?"

"Yeah.  But hold up."  I heard her footsteps behind me and felt her hands on my shoulders, but she didn't turn me around to face her.  She kissed me on the cheek, real softly.  "Just take care of yourself, OK?  Love you."

I nodded.  "Thanks.  You… too."

"OK.  Matrix is upstairs.  See you soon."

"Bye."  I pretty much ran up the stairs and then I stopped at the top, waiting for my breath to come back.  It took a lot longer than it should have from just running up a few stairs.

In spite of everything that was rattling around in my processor I couldn't help but laugh when I saw Matrix.  He was sitting on the sofa in his boxer shorts, eating cereal out of the box.  He looked a little surprised to see me for a nano.  "Hey, Sprout."

"Don't call me that!" I sighed, more out of reflex than anything else.

"Sorry!  Just once more for old times sake, I guess.  C'mon – sit down."

"Thanks."  I went over to the couch and sat next to him.  I kind of smiled and so did he and neither one of us said anything for a millisecond or two.

"Wasn't sure I was gonna see you today, Kid."

"I wouldn't leave without saying good-bye!"

"Naw – I guess I knew that."

I took a deep breath and looked around the room.  It'd changed a lot since Bob had moved out and they moved in – there was more furniture and stuff, but less garbage and clothes and stuff.  It looked more like our place at the diner.  I figure that was pretty much Andri's doing.  "I told Dot I didn't want you guys to come over when I left.  I'm sorry…  I just didn't-"

"I know why you did it.  It's OK."

"What?"

Matrix chuckled.  "I know why, and it's no big deal.  I understand, Kiddo.  Don't even worry about it."

"Thanks." I sighed.  We both sat in silence for a while.  "I went over and saw your tree." 

"What's that, now?"

I smiled up at him.  "Y'know – your tree.  _My_ tree.  The once you gave me when I turned 1.0."

"Yeah?  How's it look?"

"Pretty good.  It's grown a lot since then.  I had to check just to be sure it was the same one!  But it is…"

He smiled back at me.  "Well – it's been a long time.  Sometimes I look at you and think the same thing."

"Yeah?"

"Sure."

"I guess it was a pretty good present.    Sorry if I didn't say anything when you gave it to me.  I guess it took a while for me to figure it out."

"No problem."  He squeezed my shoulder with one of his giant hands.  "Place isn't gonna be the same without you, Kid."

"Thanks."  I stared down at my feet.  "I wish you could go with me."  That was certainly true.  I felt really bad that I got to go to the Academy and Matrix never did.  It just didn't seem fair.

"Don't.  You have to live your life your way, Enzo – not mine.  I learned stuff my own way.  I wouldn't trade a nano of it."

"But-"

"Hey – if I'd gone to the Academy Mainframe might have been destroyed, who knows?  And AndrAIa and I might've never fallen in love.  Things work out the way they work out – you just have to make the best of it.  I know this is what's right for you."

"I hope so."

"Don't worry.  Just do me one favor, OK?"

I frowned at him.  "Sure.  What?"

He smiled.  "Just make sure they remember the name 'Enzo Matrix' for as long as there's an Academy.  OK?"  I stared back at him for a nano.  All I could do was nod.  "Good boy.  Kick a little ASCII whole you're at it, too!  But don't tell Dot I said that."

"OK!" I whispered.  Every time I looked at Matrix I tried to picture myself in his face, but I could never do it.  It was still hard for me to believe we were the same sprite, even after all this time.  But still, there were moments when I felt so connected to him that it almost scared me.

"Alphanumeric.  And try to have a little fun too, OK?"

"Yeah.  I promise."  He put me in a headlock, which was something he liked to do.  I always pretended to try and break out of it, but I never really did.  There was no point – I couldn't possibly budge him if I wanted, and besides, I didn't mind that much anyway.  "You know what's basic?"

"What's that?"

"I always figured you'd be the one to leave.  Y'know?"

"What do you mean?"

"It's just – when I'd get scared and think about us not being together.  'Cause you're the only one I can really talk to about a lot of stuff, so sometimes I'd think about what it'd be like not to be able to talk to you…  I guess I always thought that if it happened, it'd be because you guys went away, not me."

"Why would you say that?  You were always planning to go to the Academy, weren't you?"

"I guess so.  But it always seemed like it was a million hours away.  Right up until Bob told me I was ready."

"Hmmm." Matrix sighed.  He gave my head one last squeeze and let me up.  "And just were exactly did you think _I_ was gonna go?"

"I dunno.  Maybe off to fight Daemon or something…"

"Well… That could still happen-"

"No!" I almost shouted it.  "Don't say that.  Dot would be really bummed if you left.  Then she'd be back to having no brothers again!"

"Don't worry so much." He scowled.  "You're gonna be back soon enough, and maybe I won't have to go anywhere.   Dot'll be just fine – you know how strong she is."

"I guess…  But-"

"End file with that stuff, Kid.  Just worry about taking care of business at the Academy, Got it?  You've got a tough job ahead of you – a lot of hard work.  Take care of business and I'll make sure things are OK here, all right?"

"Really?"

"Just trust me."  Matrix smiled, which was still a pretty rare event.  But maybe not as much as before.

"Matrix…  Don't do anything dumb.  If the war gets bad or something and you have to fight…  Don't…  Don't delete, OK?  Just stay here and make sure Dot and Bob are OK."

"Enzo-"

"Please don't delete.  Promise me."

"Enzo, I can't-"

"_Please_, Matrix!  Just promise!"

He stared at me for a nano.  "I promise, Kid.  I promise I'll be here when you get back.  We'll throw you a hell of a party too.  OK?"

"Thanks." I sighed and closed my eyes.  For some reason, the thought of everyone I loved being out of sight and beyond my control for two hours was totally scary.  I knew, in my processor, that bad stuff could still happen even if I was there with them.  It just didn't _seem_ that way right at that nano…

I felt Matrix' hand on my shoulder.  "You just…  Just take care of yourself.  Remember everything Bob told you.  Even whatever _I_ taught you, if you think of it.  And don't take any recycle bin crap from anybody."

"I won't.  I promise."  I opened my eyes and tried to smile.  "I guess I should probably go…"

"Yeah."  Matrix stuck out his hand.  "Good luck, Kid.  I'll be with you every nano."

"Thanks, Big Guy."  I took his hand and shook it, then I sort of fell against his chest.  "Bye."

"So long, Little Brother."  He pounded on my back a couple times.  "Hey…  Are you wearing _cologne_?"

I pulled away and look down at my feet.  "No!  I'm not…"

I heard Matrix chuckle.  "I think you are!"

"No!  It's… It's aftershave, I was just practicing, that's all."

"Oh!  Well, _that_ explains it."

I shook my head and felt my cheeks burning.  "Whatever, OK?  I…  I gotta go.  Bob's probably waiting."

"OK."  He smiled wryly and shook his head.  "Remember what I said, Enzo.  When they tell stories at that Academy in twenty hours, I want stars in their eyes when they say our name.  Right?"

"Right." I grinned.  We looked at each other for a few more nanos.  I couldn't think of anything else to say, and I guess he couldn't either.  I bit my lip and waved, then took off down the stairs.

When I got down to the garage Andri was back underneath the car, working on something.  Probably the interocitor - it's always the interocitor.  I thought about talking to her again, but I wasn't sure I could take it.  I just yelled out "Bye, Andri." And kept walking.  Like it was no big file, I'd see her at the diner the next day.  She said bye back at me, her voice kinda echoing from under the car.

And that was that.  

I walked back over to Baudway and over to the Diner.  It was pretty hard for me to look at the diner.  Pretty much every good memory I have involves the diner in some way.  I couldn't see the diner without thinking of Bob and Mac.  And Dot – especially Dot.  Her name's even on the roof, so I guess that's no shock.

Bob had all my stuff sitting out in the living room when I got back to the apartment, ready to go.  Dot was cleaning food and stuff off Mac's face – I guess he'd just eaten his lunch.  She smiled at me when I came into the room.  "Hey, Sweetie.  Everything OK?"

"Yeah.  Yeah, thanks.  I was just saying good-bye to Matrix and AndrAIa."

"You hungry?"

"Naw."  My stomach was doing flip-flops – even the mention of food made me a little sick.  "I don't think I could eat anything."

"Really?  Are you sure?"

"Yeah." I sighed.  

"All right."  She smiled again, but she didn't look too happy.  "I was just about to put Mac down for his nap.  Bob should be home any nano and then I guess you…you…"

"Lemme see him, OK?"

"Sure."  She set Mac down on the carpet and he started crawling straight towards me.  He was getting really good at it – I guess he was gonna start walking soon.  Talking, too.  But I wouldn't be around to see it.

I squatted down and the baby came right up to me.  "He said 'Guh!' which I think was his favorite word.  He started banging his hand on my knee, with his palm open and his fingers spread real far apart.

"Ow!  That hurts.  Don't you know how strong you are?"  He just stared up at me and giggled.  I hoisted him under the arms and lifted him up.  "How you doin', Sprout?  Huh?"  He loved it when I talked to him – it didn't even matter what I said.

I held him for a few nanos while he made all his weird little noises and squirmed around.  "I'm gonna be gone for a little while, but I'll be back.  Don't wreck any of my stuff, OK?  And you can't have my circuit racing helmet, either."

"Oh, Enzo!  Stop it."

"Sorry, Dot."  I smiled at Mac for a few nanos and talked baby talk to him, which I've never been able to figure out why people do but I always do it anyways.  Then I handed him to Dot and she took him into the bedroom for his nap.  I waved at him over her shoulder, but he didn't wave back.  I figured every time I saw him for the next two hours he'd have grown so much he'd be like a different baby.  And then one time I'd look at him and he wouldn't even be a baby anymore…

Bob clapped me on the shoulder and scared the data out of me.  I hadn't even heard him come in.   "Hey, Tiger.  When you get back?"

"A few nanos ago.  Where were you?"

"I was just going over some stuff with Phong before we leave – emergency plans, all that - games and tears and stuff.  For when I'm not here. You about ready to leave?  I'd like to get to Gallifrey Seven before dinner."

"Yeah." I sighed.  "I guess."

"Cool.  Get everything you wanted to done?"

I looked around the diner.  "I guess so, Bob.  How long will the trip take?"

"Three or four seconds, maybe.  Be over before you know it."  He glanced over my shoulder.  I turned and looked.  Dot was standing in their bedroom doorway, staring at us.  "I, uh, got a few things to pack before we go.  Take your time, OK?"  He winked at me and squeezed past Dot into the bedroom.

I went over and sat down on the couch, just staring straight ahead.  I heard Dot's light footsteps as she walked over and sat next to me.  After a couple of nanos she put her hand on mine.  "I suppose it's about that time."

I just nodded.  I didn't really trust myself to say anything.  She squeezed my hand.  "Will you do me a favor?"  I looked up at her.  "Stay strong for me the next few micros?  I'm afraid I'm going to get pretty…  Well, you know.  I need you to be strong for me, OK?"

"I'll try."  A whisper was the best I could do.

"Thanks."  She half-smiled and squeezed my hand some more.  "You know, I always expected this cycle to come.  I knew Mainframe couldn't hold you – you're restless.  You always were.  Always wondering if something a little better might be out there and never wanting to miss it."  She sighed.  "I knew it was coming but it doesn't make it any easier."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be."  Dot wrapped her arm around my shoulder and I leaned over against her.  "I know in my heart this is right for you.  And I know you'll come home, too.  Just like your brother did.  Only a lot sooner!"

"I guess."  I just closed my eyes and tried to block out as much from my processor as I could.  "I'll come home, Sis.  I really will."

"I know."  She chuckled and kissed me on the head.  "User, there's so much I'm not going to be there for!  Your voice breaking, your first girlfriend, your first date…"

I'd never even _known_ any girls my own age – the whole concept of a date or a girlfriend sounded pretty bizarre to me.  "That's not going to happen for a long time.  Maybe ever."

"Oh, Enzo!  You just don't know what it's going to be like, that's all.  I missed all those moments with your brother – it's hard to accept that I'm going to miss them with you, too.  Try not to grow up completely in the next two hours, OK?"

"Dot!  Stop it…"   

She laughed real softly.  "In two hours you'll be a Guardian.  My little brother!  Won't that be amazing?"

"I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you, too.  But as long as I know you're OK, _I'll_ be OK.  So promise me you'll take care of yourself."

"I promise."

"Be careful." She whispered.  "Be careful in the games and listen to the teachers.  Take care of yourself and make sure you eat properly and if you get sick, you go straight to the infirmary and let them look after you!  Promise."

"Promise."

"OK."  Dot sighed and gave me a little squeeze with her arm.  "Mouse and Ray will be there most of the time…  They'll be there to help if you need them.  And you can always get in touch with me if you're…  If you're lonely…"

I couldn't hold myself back anymore and I hugged her, although I still didn't say anything.  She wrapped both her arms around me.  "Enzo, all that stuff we talked about a few cycles ago…  You know how I feel, don't you?  You know you're still my angel and I want you here with me and I always will, no matter what-"

"I know.  I know.  I was just being dumb." 

"No, you weren't dumb."  She held me and didn't say anything for a few nanos.  "That's all over, now.  I'll be waiting when you come home, OK?  You've got a long weekend in six minutes and we'll see you then.  And the semester break isn't far past that – that's four whole minutes!  You'll be having so much fun you won't even want to come home."

"Yeah."  I finally opened my eyes and looked at her.  She looked just the same to me as she always had, as long as I could remember.  I could always see Dot's face - whenever I needed it I could launch it and open it in my processor.  It was a part of me, so deep inside me that I couldn't even live if it wasn't there.  "I love you so much…"

"You too, Sweetie."  She smiled.  "Remember – be strong for me, OK?  I need you to get me through this."

"OK.  I'll try…"

"Thanks." Dot whispered.  "I have a little surprise for you, Angel."

"What?"

She smiled again, looking for the first time like she really meant it.  "Bob was talking to his dad, and one thing led to another, and guess what?"

"What?"

"Bob and I are coming to the Academy and he's going to teach a course!  Right after the semester break!"

"Dot!  Really?"

"Really!  Matrix can handle the games for a little while, and Phong and AndrAIa can run the P.O. just fine."

"Alphanumeric!  What's he going to teach?"

She giggled and squeezed me.  "Web survival skills.  He's going to be teaching for a whole six minutes.  We'll get an apartment at the Academy and bring Mac and you can stay with us.  We'll be together for six whole minutes!"

"Dot, that's so awesome!"  I laughed and kissed her on the cheek.  "That's totally cool!"

"It's a while down the road…  But we'll make it.  We'll have the long weekends and the break.  We'll be just fine."

"Yeah."  There was a little bubble of euphoria in me for a nano.  It started to fade away, but I could still feel it in there.  I realized that the way to get through this was to think of it in little bits at a time, not all at once.  Get through the first cycle, the first minute.  Come home for a few cycles in six minutes, and then the semester break wouldn't be all _that_ far off.  Maybe I really could do it…

"I guess you should go.  I know Bob's waiting."

"Yeah."  I _really_ didn't feel like letting go of Dot.

"Sweetie…"  Dot brushed my hair out of my eyes and kissed me on the forehead.  "I love you."

"I know."

"Have fun.  Enjoy every nano of it.  You're a really lucky boy, you know that?  I'll see you in six minutes."

"OK" I rasped.  "Six minutes."  I finally let go of Dot and stood up, and she stood up next to me.  I could feel stuff brimming all around my eyes, but as hard as it was for me to believe I hadn't cried.  I kissed Dot and smiled.  "Bob!"

He poked his head out of the bedroom after a nano.  "All set?"

"Yeah."  I picked up a couple of my portable storage units and my guitar and Bob grabbed the rest.

"You take care of him!  Be careful traipsing around the net!  You're sure this is a safe way to get there?"

"I promise." Bob sighed.  "Let anything happen to my best student?  I don't think so!"  He winked at me and kissed Dot on the cheek.  "See you in two or three cycles."

"All right." Dot sighed.  "You stay longer if… If he needs you to.  All right?"

"Of course.  I'll stay as long as he needs me.  But he'll be fine."

"OK.  Did you give the baby a good-bye kiss?"

"Yes, Dear."

"Stop that!" Dot scowled.  She looked down at me and sighed.  She took my face in her hands and kissed me on the nose.  "Have fun. Call if you need me.  And never forget for one nano that we all love you and we'll be counting the seconds until you come home.  OK?"

"OK.  Thanks."

"Oh, Sweetie…"  She gave me one last hard hug.  "See you in six minutes."

"K."  I was glad I was holding the storage units, because if I'd hugged her again it would have been hard to let go.  Bob tousled my hair and headed for the door.  I looked at Dot, tried my best to smile and followed him outside.  "Where we going?"

"I don't want to open the portal indoors, just in case it's unstable.  Can't be too careful, y'know?  C'mon - let's just get out on Baudway and leave from there."

"OK."   It was really happening!  In a few nanos I'd be traveling through the net with Bob, headed for the Guardian Academy.  It was like a dream – it just didn't feel like it could be my life.  But it was.  "Tell me how this works, again?"

He chuckled and shook his head.  "I don't know how to explain it so you'll understand, Enzo.  I just know how to _do_ it.  But it's pretty alphanumeric, believe me.  You ready to go?"

I couldn't say anything for a few nanos.  It sounded like an easy question, but it was one of those questions that got harder the more you thought about it.  I heard my knees knocking together and took a deep breath.  

I turned around for one last look at the diner.  There were a few customers in the booths and at the counter, having their lunch just like it was any other cycle.  Cecil was zooming around on his tracks, agitated about a messed-up order or something basic.  And Dot was in the front window, looking out at us.  I locked my eyes with hers, and she smiled at me.

I stared back at her for a nano, then I smiled, too.  She tapped her heart, just below her icon.  I tapped mine and turned around where Bob was staring back at me, not mad or impatient or anything – just looking calm and in control.  He held out his hand and I grabbed it.  He closed his eyes, like he was concentrating really hard, and a sliver of white light opened up in front of us.  And then, before I really knew what happened, we were in the net….

You won't believe how cool the net is.  You just won't believe it.


End file.
